


Blah Blah

by NyxSolei



Category: K-pop, Super Junior
Genre: Deaf Character, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-14
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2019-03-04 21:33:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13373475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NyxSolei/pseuds/NyxSolei
Summary: Senior year in high school, Kyuhyun had finally crawled out of his shell and began allowing himself to befriend new people. His disabillity in the middle, he learns how to enjoy life none the less, with a little help from Donghae.





	1. Square one

The alarm buzzed, and evidently, the vibrations woke him up. His dark brown eyes opened slowly as sun hit his face with warmth. He groaned sleep off and got up.  
Kyuhyun isn't a morning person, but he'd rather suffer a little, than suffer a lot and be late. He gently ruffled his hair, sitting up and grabbing whichever part of clothing he could find first. He looked at the time, he still had a few more moments to himself.  
He yanked on his uniform jacket, and while grabbing his bag, he headed out of the room.  
It was his third year in high school, where he's bound to finish studying program development. His school contained many different students, all majoring in different subjects, such as arts, science and a few other that Kyuhyun couldn't bother to remember. The only downside of this prestigious school is the location - it was close to the shore, thus making it close to absolutly nothing but a little town that Kyuhyun already knew by heart.  
Weekends could get boring sometimes, but he'd usually spend them with his friends at the shore. Unfortunately, that is something that during winter is impossible as the snow piles up, or a storm rages.  
which is exactly the situation right now.

Sitting in the classroom, barely paying attention to the teacher, Kyuhyun looked out of the window and pondered on what should he do in the upcoming weekend. The snow and frost softly covered the windows, there's no where to go but the dorms.  
He felt a tap against his shoulder as the student next to him passed him a note.

_You should pay attention! Stop slacking off, Kyu!_

He chuckled a little at the note and looked at Henry beside him. The male was one of Kyuhyun's best friends, and this was one of the reasons why. While Kyuhyun struggles with paying attention at class, Henry would not only pay attention, but also made sure he did as well.  
Henry winked at the other, quickly writing down the material. Kyuhyun shook his head lightly with a smile on his face.  
Soon enough, class was over, but for some reason Kyuhyun couldn't figure out, the teacher asked everyone to stay for a little while.  
The teacher said something, but it was too quick for him to pick up, he only saw the rejoice in the students' faces. They began clapping and smiling at each other, some even blush at what ever the announcement was.  
He raised an eyebrow and looked over to Henry, questioning.  
"In two weeks it'll be the winter break, and the school decided to let us have some alone time with no teachers for a night!" Henry quickly explained, almoust too quickly for Kyuhyun.  
"What does that mean?" The brown-haired one signed and mouthed, without any vocal.  
Henry smiled as he placed his arm around him, "That means, we get to party here for once." His face looked excited, but Kyuhyun wasn't sure yet if it was because of the upcoming party, or because of a girl he has been looking at for the last few minutes.

Hardly hearing has it's bonuses. For example, you can pick up facial expressions a lot better, and generally body language as well. It was one of the only things Kyuhyun excelled at, and proudly admitted so.  
None the less, it also has its' minuses - such as not being able to hear when someone shouts at you to get out of the way. He received a blow from a bag that went soaring his way. After hissing, and rubbing his temple, where the bag hit, he turned around to the direction it was thrown from.  
He saw there two males, standing and laughing, and another one less amused. The blond-haired one, which was also the one that looked slightly less happy about the situation, pushed the other two away towards the classroom's door. Just before the three escaped, he turned towards Kyuhyun, muttering "Sorry".

"What was that for?" The light-haired asked the two others, with a tad of annoyance in his tone. The two looked at each other even more amused, then glanced back to the other,"It was just a joke, Donghae," One said.  
The other shook his head in disbelief,"Just so happens that today Sungmin threw the bag at the deaf guy. It was pretty funny." The male smiled, and gave Sungmin a nudge,"He looks like an angry fish, he's opening his mouth but nothing comes out."  
Donghae sighed,"Hyukjae, that's just plain mean." He turned around and headed to his locker on the first floor.

Watching Kyuhyun from the side made Donghae think that he is pretty lonely. At class he would sit and stare out of the window, or scribble something that Donghae couldn't comprehend in his notebook. At weekends, he'd just disappear. When Donghae asked his friends if they had seen where, he'd get the same answer every time - "Don't know".  
He pity the male, but never managed to get a step ahead of pitying him, such as befriending him or even talking to him at all. He figured out that even if he would talk to the latter, they'd have nothing in common to talk about. Donghae is a music major, while Kyuhyun is a Programming major. Music is something that Kyuhyun could never understand.  
Shrugging of his thoughts, he headed towards his last class for the day - composing.

"Just the way we speak, we can use different tones to express our emotions better, so it is in music." The teacher began his lecture," Music is a language, just like Korean, Japanese, Mandarin and so. When I want to express something I chose my words, in which I think will show my mind best. Next, I add to it my tone and volume." He smiled at his students and the one-sided dimple showed. Mr. Park was Donghae's favorite, since his methods of teaching weren't exactly as boring and old-school.  
"In addition, we use our facial expression and body language to adjust to our words. There's a difference when you're looking at the ground and tell someone you love them, or look at them in the eye, and with passion declare so." The students laughed at the demonstration and after a little while of rambling within the class, Mr. Park continued.  
"It is very much alike in music. When we compose, we chose our key, which is like our tone of speech. Then, we chose the chords or notes, which is like choosing words. The interesting part is using the pace of our composition and the volume too." He explained calmly.  
Donghae pondered upon the older's words. To him, music was something that was written out of an emotion and situation. Perhaps those things came for him naturally, but maybe there are some that cannot agree with that. Music was like a second language for him, something universal that everyone speaks.  
Well, almoust everyone.

"Your assignment for this week is to write a short composition describing someone. No words, only music. Be sure to think about everything we talked about in class, and chose your instruments accordingly. Good job everyone, class dismissed." Mr. Park declared with a smile as people began packing and leaving. Donghae contemplated long on the homework they were given. He had never thought about music that way, to describe a living person. Then again, music too, is a living thing for him.  
  
Grabbing his guitar, he headed to the yard, where he'd usually stay and play a little, before heading to dinner or to the dorms.  
Feeling the cold winter air, he took a deep breath, and let it all at once, as he hit the first chord. Upon strumming, he felt content. Most of the day Donghae had to manage running from one place to another, from one friend to another. This was the only time he had some peace, and he found it mainly in music.  
His warm brown eyes scanned the area, seeing the soft snow and footprints in it. Looking a little higher, he saw the lights coming from the dormitory, some flicker due to students passing by. Above the grand building, his eyes were caught in the many stars that began showing up on the sky. Donghae filled his lungs with cold air to his extent, and when he let it all out, he knew what was his next chord.

Kyuhyun entered his room, placing his bag at the corner of it. It was freezing inside, and outside, since he forgot to close his window when he left in a hurry this morning. Closing it quickly, he looked out to see many students passing by, all concerned with their own matters. Sometimes, he liked to watch people pass and try and figure out what kind of person they are. He could already divide them almost instantly to the different faculties at school, but other than that - what they were wearing, how they were walking, what their face looked like. He took it all into account.  
Shaking off the thought to clear his head for homework, Kyuhyun opened his laptop, and looked at the different tasks he had to finish. A bug here, a bit of patching there. Nothing too grand, but it was the boring work he tended to leave for next time. He tried to work for a while, but to no avail. Usually, he had no problem to sit and work silently, quiet literally. But on other occasions, Kyuhyun had a really rough time concentrating. He groaned, and opened the chat, where he saw his friend online.  
"Hey, are you busy?" He sent without thinking twice. He waited eagerly for a reply, and received it just a moment later.  
"Not at all. Are you?"  
Kyuhyun smiled at the reply, and quickly wrote back,"Can't concentrate, wanna head out? I'm bored out of my mind, Ryeowook."  
He stretched and looked out of the window again, the snow was still piling up, and it seemed like the wind was blowing. Not the greatest weather to head for a walk, but it's better than staying in and playing Starcraft again. As much as he loved the game, and he really did, he has to manage some social life too.  
"Yeah, let's meet next to the playground." The male smiled with content at the message, and quickly began grabbing his belongings. At times like this, he was really thankful he could talk to someone, someone that doesn't care he can't really talk.

Outside was extremely cold. The wind blew with such passion, Kyuhyun had trouble keeping his hoodie on from time to time. His fingers felt numb at their tips, but he liked the feeling. Anything that picks up his senses is a great sensation. Walking with his hands shoved in his sweater's pockets, he headed slowly towards the old playground.  
Before this became a high school, it was an elementary school as well. Five years ago it was converted to a large high-school that offered different masteries to those who can afford them, or receive a scholarship. In Kyuhyun's case it was the second part.  
Three years ago, he applied for a scholarship, showing quality work as he developed an app that could simply teach the user sign language. He thought it was odd that there were so many apps that taught different languages, but none was sign.  
Sitting down at the cold swing, he closed his eyes for a moment, and upon opening them, he caught in the corner of his eye some movement. Jerking his head to the direction, he saw another student, playing the guitar.  
He was **jealous**.

Before the accident he used to love music, and now it was derived from him. Before the accident, he could spend his evenings in a similar manner. He'd play, sing, and enjoy the feeling of strumming soft strings under his slender fingers. He planned to study music and compose, too. But life didn't agree with him.  
After the accident everything became quiet. He remembers the time he woke up at the hospital, being hesitantly told something, but he couldn't make out what it was. He looked around the white room, scanning the different machines he was attached to. It was scarier than the accident itself. Waking up, and hearing silence.  
Seeing different faces so concerned, as they began yelling and crying at him, pleading for him to listen. But he couldn't. When he couldn't, and realized it was permenant, he felt his tears escaping ever so lightly. He hold onto his mother, looking at her with nothing but fear.  
"I _can't_ hear you, mother," He said, his hands tight around her wrists,"Mom, I _can't_ hear you. Please.." He pleaded, sobbing,"Please tell them to let me hear again..." He murmured, as it was almoust incoheret. That was when his dream of being a musician simply went mute.

He shook off the memories, and slowly approached the male. Kyuhyun could still recognize the chords he was playing: D, F#m, Bm.  
The student was playing a ballade. Very slowly, and very carefully, so it seems. Kyuhyun followed a little closer, evidently making himself noticeable in front of the male. He stood there quietly, looking at him playing. Although he couldn't hear the guitar playing, he heard the chords in his mind. Music was something that he couldn't forget, unlike words, or pronounciations.  
  
Donghae looked up to the other with a soft smile,"You like music?" He asked in an uplifting manner, stopping his playing at once. It was an odd question to ask someone who can't hear a thing.   
Kyuhyun saddened, as his look dropped,"I love it." He signed, even though his hands were freezing,"Weird, right?" He asked with a sorrowful smirk.  
The light-haired one shook his head, and signed back,"Some things just come from inside you, I guess." He shrugged, as he left the latter in disbelief.  
"You know sign?" Kyuhyun asked eagerly. If he had a voice, it would be thrilled. He never considered anyone to know sign besides Henry.  
  
Donghae laughed, and placed his guitar back in it's case,"I figured out that it's not fair for you to know how to speak, but I won't know how to sign. We are in the same class, no?"  
Kyuhyun nodded, smiling a little,"The ballade was great, did you compose it?" He asked, smile not leaving his face. He was flattered. Even though it was their first time actually speaking, Kyuhyun could see the honesty in Donghae's words. It was his type - as Kyuhyun liked to tell himself.  
"It was something still in work. But, I thought you couldn't hear it?" The blond-haired asked with hesitation,"I mean, no offense and all, you're just.. deaf, you know?" Donghae felt flustered to say and sign so.  
  
Kyuhyun laughed at it,"I used to play the guitar too, before I became like this. I have a pretty good memory of chords, and how things should sound like."  
"That's amazing!" Donghae exclaimed, without signing,"So if I play anything, you can understand it, and you'll have the sound in your mind?" He asked excitedly, what made the dark-haired one burst in laughter again.  
"It's nothing, really. It's the only thing I have left." His smile was sad, but it soon changed as his eyes met Ryeowook from afar,"Ryeowook!" He called, what probably sounded mispronounced, but those who are around him usually understand what he intended to say.  
"Good luck with your ballade." He signed finally, leaving the other sitting alone in complete bewilderment at the bench.

Even though if felt odd, Donghae knew who he's going to describe in his assignment.  
Quickly pulling out of his bag the music sheets, he wrote down what he had up until now - D, F#m and Bm. This was good for the beginning, but not for an opening. He wanted to describe the melancholic feeling he had, yet the slight peace in his manner.  
This was a long night.


	2. Chapter 2

He felt eyes staring at him, more than the usual. Although he was used to the common scanning faces that he managed to catch, Kyuhyun wasn't prepared for so many stares and whispers. There's nothing he hates more than whispers.  
What's the point in them if he can just read their lips?   
He dropped his look and quietly headed towards his locker, only to meet Ryeowook and Henry there. The two looked at each other with a smug smile, then looked back to Kyuhyun,"Good morning." Ryeowook signed happily.  
This gesture made Kyuhyun raise his eyebrow,"Is there something going on that I'm not aware of?" He quickly replied. The two laughed with each other, what made him even more frustrated, understanding much less than before.  
"You got an admirer, Kyu." Henry was trying hard to fight off laughter,"And he's just your type."  
"Tall, blond.." Ryeowook continued as Kyuhyun was getting more and more agitated with every word,"Sweet. I'd wish someone wrote a song for me too." He mocked.  
Kyuhyun groaned and slammed his locker's door just after he grabbed his belongings for the day. He was speechless, and preferred to stay so.   
He couldn't think of anyone that would do something so terrible. No one came up to his mind when he thought about that people that hated him that much to do such vile thing. It was simply to mock him, to laugh at him. There's a limit to how much he can afford to withstand.  
"Who is that?" He finally asked his friends,"Who did that?" His glare was dark, as he decided to take action of this matter.  
Ryeowook said something that Kyuhyun didn't manage to catch, and left him alone with Henry, who looked at him with a shy smile.  
"Look, Kyu, it's not as bad as you think." He tried to calm him down, to no avail,"I'm sure he had no intention of degrading you whatsoever." Henry smiled sheepishly.  
" **Who is it?** " Kyuhyun repeated, slowly and aggressively,"Henry, I'd rather hear from you than search for him myself." His look was threating, as the two began walking towards the classroom.

Donghae lifted his guitar from the floor, placing it in his lap. He loved the sound of this specific type - it was warm, but had a sting to it at its end. The practice room was pretty empty, except for some girls praticing on keyboard.   
The large room was covered in oak walls and floor, and held no windows. If there was no clock around, he couldn't have known the time. Since it was still early, and his next class was only 20 minutes away, he decided to spend his time here.  
"Donghae-oppa, write a song about me too." A classmate sat next to him on the sofa,"You compose so well, don't you think others deserve a song too? Maybe I deserve it?" She looked at him with hopeful eyes, but when she saw he wasn't paying back with the same excitement, she saddned.  
He smiled shyly, dropping his look and scanning the room for anything but the girl,"I'm sure you'll have your own song written for you. I'm still working on perfecting this piece." The male showed her the music score, pride atoning to his features.  
"Oppa, why write a song for someone that can't hear it? And someone so weird. It's not like you at all." She claimed, slowly raising her hand to place on his shoulder,"You should write music for someone that appreciates it, oppa." Her words became almoust a whisper, what made Donghae shudder.  
Very quickly, he grabbed his belongings and stood up,"Sorry Yeri, I have to.." He muttered, some music sheets falling from his grip,"I have to go, I have class soon, and I should really get ready and all." Donghae hastily left the room, grabbing the scattered score on the way.   
Situations like this made Donghae very nervous. Even though he seemed confident, having someone so close to you, that shows interest in you, makes him anxious. He could never seemed to pick the correct words to say, and was constantly left agape as he missed his chance.  
  
He let go of a deep sigh that was hidden in his fast-paced thoughts. Sadly, he couldn't relax for very long as he felt himself being slammed against the wall aggressively.  
"What the **hell** do you think you're doing?" Kyuhyun signed so quickly it forced him to process the words longer than usual. He looked down at the hand that pushed against the hem of his shirt, then quickly glanced at the furious features of the man in front of him.  
Donghae smiled uncomfortably as he placed his hands over the other's wrist,"Going to class?" He said, not being able to sign back. The blond felt stares from two sides of the corridor, but it seemed that the other didn't care for it too much.  
"Do you could write another song and humiliate me like this? Who do you think you are?" The male tried to speak, but the words weren't close to what he meant. He pushed Dongahe further against the cold wall. His dark eyes stared directly to the taller's brown ones. "What did I ever do to you to hate me so much?" He barked.  
The blond took a deep breath, and although his instincts were telling him to yell at the latter, he decided to handle the matter calmly. It wasn't easy for him, but it was the best way to show Kyuhyun what he meant with his song,"It wasn't meant to hurt you, or humiliate you, I'm sorry." His arms pulled the other's hand from keeping him in place.  
"I admired the way you talk about music, and the way you listened to it. I got inspired." He admitted quietly as he looked to his sides, only to face students taking out their phones and documenting the argument.  
"I am truly sorry for what it caused you." His voice revealed his defeat. His look dropped and he took a step away from the man that was standing in front of him.   
"Sorry my ass Donghae. Leave me **alone**." He spat back, and left before anything else could be said.

Occasionally, Kyuhyun would step away from facing problems in this manner. However, he couldn't stand the stares anymore and acted so.  
Looking back it was probably not the wisest idea, since the students that happened to be there recorded everything and uploaded it to their SNS pages. He felt embarrassed as he looked through the different videos. It wasn't enough to humiliate him through Donghae's song, but also making this public, made him long to run away. Sadly, the week just started and by the amount of views the video achieved, seems like Kyuhyun would have to suffer a bit more.  
He sighed and stared at the screen blankly. It couldn't be that bad, could it? For whatever stupid reason Donghae decided to write his homework assignment dedicated for Kyuhyun, it will be forgotten evidently and he'd be left alone again. He could relax and live his life calmly like before - without the glares and stares he received throughout the day.   
Exhaustion taking over him, he decided it's best to text his friends before he hits bed. He opened the chat with Ryeowook and Henry.  
"You guys are busy? I could use some walk outside." He typed in quickly. Not long until he received an answer from Henry.  
"I'm busy doing homework. Aren't you?" Kyuhyun chuckled to himself at the fast reply.  
"Are you even doing homework, Kyu? You can't fail this semester, you know." Ryeowook joined.  
"I finished it all when I was angry. So I take that you guys can't?"  
"No, sorry." Henry replied, followed by another "No.." from Ryeowook.  
The male let out a sigh and groaned right after, closing his laptop and dragging himself to his door.

The cold weather outside relaxed him, and he enjoyed the evening. He couldn't bare having so many people looking at him with a crooked look, so being alone felt great.   
He strolled down to the old playground, where he usually spent the late evenings with his friends, but without them it felt strange. He felt like no one could really sympathize with his situation, and he couldn't even think of how his friends probably reacted to the video of him.  
Kyuhyun looked up to the dark sky, trying to find the stars he was familiar with, but very quickly it bored him. He tried to draw in the snow, but everything he had managed to put together looked simply ridiculous to him. After trying to no avail to entertain himself, he decided to head back to the dorm.  
Very soon, he stopped at the same bench he stopped yesterday. The blond man that was enjoying his guitar didn't seem to notice the male just yet and Kyuhyun took time to look at the chords he was playing. They were the same as yesterday, only Donghae didn't seem to stop after three chords. He prolongued it.  
He stepped in closer to get a better look. Even though he was angry with the man, music indulged him and what he has managed to put together came out as a beautifull ballade that made him relax and enjoy.  
It held something very sad to it, but at the same time something very peaceful.  
"Do you like it?" Donghae suddenly turned towards him, what startled the other as he dropped his look and pretended not to be interested.  
"I know you listened, _Kyu_." He said with a warm smile.  
"You're not allowed to call me that. Only my friends call me so." He replied quickly, getting closer to the bench.  
Donghae laughed and placed his guitar back,"Are we not?"  
It made the male growl, fold his arms and roll his eyes, not bothering to even reply.  
"Listen, I'm sorry, I didn't know this would be the outcome." The blond signed gently and stood up to meet the latter's eyes,"I felt inspired when you talked about the way you remember music, and how you love it."  
Kyuhyun shook his head,"It's humilliating, you know. Everyone was staring and glaring. Girls came to me and barked at me on how could I take away their beloved oppa." He replied sharply.  
The other laughed, and with time the laughter only grew stronger,"I'm not anyone's oppa." He managed to place his words,"If anything, I just want to be your friend." With that remark, he placed his warm hand over Kyuhyun's shoulder and smiled to him as his laughter decayed.  
The brown-haired male looked away with embarrassment,"Whatever." He replied, feeling warmth covering his cheeks and ears. Quickly, he took a step back and looked into the other's eyes,"Whatever. Just don't write songs about me anymore. It's weird. People might get the wrong idea."  
"That I like you?" Donghae said with a smirk, not letting Kyuhyun's eyes escape,"Maybe in time it won't be so wrong. Besides, who cares, really. If I can't do friendly gestures like that it sucks. What does it matter that you're my inspiration, or anyone else?"  
He felt his heart beginning to beat at a faster pace as he escaped the male's glance again,"I don't care. Do whatever you want." He admitted, even though he knew that Donghae would take it the wrong way.   
A few more minutes passed before anyone said anything. The cool breeze brushed against the warmth that grew over his cheeks and it made the flutter in his chest more noticeable. He couldn't put his finger on what he was feeling, but it was the first time he felt so.  
"Don't let other people get you, Kyu. And if any girl comes and complains, I'll handle it. I promise I'll protect you."

_I promise I'll protect you._


	3. snow storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> classes are cancelled due to the snow storm. Donghae takes the opportunity to get to know Kyuhyun better.

"Did you hear?" Ryeowook initiated the chat.  
" **No**." Kyuhyun replied with a slight groan, staring at the laptop screen.  
"Right, sorry. Anyway. Classes are canceled today, there's a power outage in the main building!" His friend typed back quickly.  
The brunet smiled at the announcement and looked out of his window. Sadly, it was showing before him a great storm. Usually, when those things happen, they'd hit the beach, but there's not much to do in a furious snow storm.  
"I think I'll head to the library, I haven't read any books in a while." He wrote eventually, and forced himself up from the carpet floor. His room was decorated with all sorts of things - pictures from past years, posters of various idols, different sticky notes he never managed to get rid off. He liked the coziness in the warm room, and if he could, especially at this time, he'd stay in.  
Heading out right now means struggling with students and facing the video of his fight with Donghae. A week after it occurred, people began to spread rumors about the two - whether it was the common _"They're a couple!"_ rumor, or something even more creative like - _"Kyuhyun and Donghae are actually cousins that were split by a family matter!"_. Nonetheless, any variation of any rumor caused Kyuhyun to cringe and wish to be left alone.  
He hasn't seen the blond after their meeting that evening. The only time he made an appearance was during English and Chinese class. However, nothing more was heard from him, what caused more rumors to be spread.  
But that wasn't the only thing it has caused - the way that Donghae talked that evening made Kyuhyun feel in a very odd way, something he couldn't understand yet, but wasn't enough bothered to ask Henry or Ryeowook about it.

The library was empty, except for some stray couples making out in the dark hallways, hidden by piles of books. Kyuhyun apologized every time he passed next to such sight, and continued heading the other way. Eventually, he managed to find a corner for himself, ending up at the foreign authors section.   
The male wasn't much of a reader, but he had nothing better to do - when storms take over the place, it's either stay in your room and do homework, or end up like the people in the library. The school was far away from any civilization, and un-authorized walks into town were prohibited. To get any kind of authorization you had do go through a whole lot of rules, and let the staff know a week before, stating your reason of leaving and time of return.  
This was something that he didn't like, which is why the beach was such a perfect escape. Technically, he broke no rule when heading there, since it is on school grounds. It's a calm place that you can simply walk to, but most people are too cooped up within the school to go there. From time to time, Kyuhyun would see new faces that joined his group at their usual hangout space. Often, those faces would show up and the next time they'd be gone.   
It never occurred to him why people dislike going there, or why people were so lazy, but when he thought about a good reason, he found none.  
He felt a tap on his shoulder that knocked him out of his thoughts,"It's good to see you." as he turned around to the source of the tap, he saw the blond male sign. Kyuhyun groaned, and closed the open book he was holding absentmindedly.   
"Why do I keep seeing you where ever I go?" He replied with an unhappy expression,"Are you following me?" Kyuhyun returned the book to it's place, and looked at others, trying to pick out one.  
Donghae seemed to chuckle,"What happens if I say that I do?" He said with a smirk.  
"Then congratulations, you officially creep me out more than you already do." He snarled back. Eventually, he picked a sci-fi book, something about space opera and a great battle.  
"It's a good book." Kyuhyun felt Donghae tap him again,"I read it before." The male added, and waited for Kyuhyun's answer.  
When he received none, he waited for a while, pretending to look at other books.  
The truth is, he was looking for Kyuhyun all those days since their talk. He hoped the male would understand his intentions and let him in, but to no avail. He kept asking around people in class about him, telling Sungmin and Hyukjae he wants to get to know him, but nothing came out of it.   
Until today.

"Why do you hate me so much?" Donghae asked hesitantly after a while in silence.  
The question made the dark-haired one freeze in place. Does he hate Donghae? That's a really harsh word. Yes, he disliked the way he openly behaved about him, but he felt like he has good intentions overall.   
"I..I don't." He answered, his hands shaking a bit,"Hate is a really grand word for this _misunderstanding_." He wasn't sure whether his hands were shaking due to the weather, or due to the weird feeling he began to get again. Just like the last time, when they were alone too, and Donghae yet again spoke in this odd manner. Like his words knew exactly where to push Kyuhyun to act the way the male wants.  
Donghae smiled warmly,"Then why are you avoiding me, _Kyu?_ I thought we agreed on being friends." Kyuhyun felt a warm hand over his shoulder, as the latter looked into his eyes. The feeling grew stronger, and he felt his heart starting to pick up its pace.   
"I'm not..." He managed to sign shakily, before looking away. Donghae played along, and tried to catch the other's look as he kept avoiding eye-contact. Eventually, when Kyuhyun looked at him again, his smile widened, what left the brown-haired one even more perplexed.   
"How about then.." The male began to chime,"We hang out today? I don't have much to do, and if you're here it means you don't either."  
Kyuhyun tried to think of a reply quickly, but the offer didn't help the way he was feeling.   
"Okay." He managed to sign. With a heavy sigh, he followed the other, with a burden over his heart.

Fearing that anyone would notice their hangout and spread more rumors, Kyuhyun offered for them to hang out somewhere far from the dorms, but Donghae had other plans. He lead both of them to his room, where he began talking about his final project for the year, and how he wanted it to be special.  
They talked about how feelings should be expressed through music, and what genres of music they like. While Donghae liked jazz a lot, Kyuhyun is more of a ballade type.   
Their conversation was pleasant for Kyuhyun, but the tightness in his chest wasn't. The nervousness he was going through slowly slipped outside. Whether it was avoiding the other's look, or when they sat next to each other on the bed, moving a bit further from the other.  
Donghae noticed that. He wasn't stupid, nor blind. He could see that there was something that bothered his friend, but had nothing in mind that he could think of as a good reason.  
Nonetheless, he tried to keep the two entertained.  
"Oh, I almost forgot." He finally said with a smile, moving swiftly next to the other,"I wanted to give you the chords that I wrote for you. I know you can't really listen to me playing, but I thought it's the least I could do. I got an A with you." He grinned brightly, and handed him the score.  
Kyuhyun scanned the chords thoroughly. It was a slow-paced ballade, very lyrical and very emotional. Somehow, without the two talking too much, Donghae managed to capture Kyuhyun's feelings almost perfectly. The happiness and calmness, the sadness, even the shame.  
He folded the score and pushed it into his pocket,"Thank you." He said at last,"It's really good. You're really good."  
"Wait, wait," Donghae's grin widened,"I got a compliment from Cho Kyuhyun? For real? I'm not sleeping or something?"  
"Shut up!" The other pushed him away,"I take back what I said."  
"No, you can't sorry. Now you officially complimented me, Kyu." Donghae wrapped his arms around the latter, hugging his broad shoulders,"Does that mean we're friends?"  
His heart began racing again. He wasn't used to anyone touching him at any degree - not his friends, not anyone. Instead of being startled like he should be, he was overwhelmed by the liking he took to the other's touch. It was soft, warm, welcoming.  
Without paying attention too much, he leaned into the arms around him, turning to look at the blond.  
"What? You're not going to make a smart-ass comment?" Donghae was surprised,"You know, you acted this way last time too, you aren't answering me." He slipped his hair into the brown locks and playfully moved his fingers in between them,"I haven't received a yes or a no, for my question, _Kyu_."  
Kyuhyun could tell how close he was to his face, and it made want to run. To go back to his room, lock the door and stay there for the rest of the day.  
But he wasn't doing that. Not because he couldn't, but because the feeling that grew more and more within him, was telling him not to.  
"I..guess.." He tried to sign something coherent, but was low on words,"I think.."  
The frustration of not being able to talk properly was grand. With each passing second, that seemed like an hour, Kyuhyun felt more and more nervous. He felt his heart racing against his chest, and rose flush covering his cheeks.  
"Yeah." He finally said with a small smile.

He was not prepared for the reaction he received.


	4. At the Zen Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what ever happened the night before affected the two greatly. For good or for bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jumping from period to period, be prepared!

_He scoffed at the woman in front of him as he gave her a disgusted look. It was the fifth time he tried to repeat himself correctly._   
_If there was any class that made him feel especially lethargic, it was the speech correction class. It was part of his rehabilitation, and although he tried to deny any help, his parents asked him to do so. Disrespecting them would be worse than feeling like there's something wrong with him._   
_Kyuhyun didn't want to acknowledge the facts, and constantly tried to prove others that he's perfectly capable of living just like before._   
_But facts are facts, and major damage to his hearing has been done._

_For many days he wandered around the rehabilitation center, pondering on why it had to happen to him - someone that music was his passion, his dream, his other self. When he was singing, he felt alive. But at the hospital he felt broken, he felt empty._   
_The male sat in front of the teacher, and repeated the line again, feeling displeased with himself. He didn't want to believe that he won't be able to talk, or practice music._   
_They offered him a solution, but he swore he'd never use **that.**_

He shook his thoughts away as he felt students rising from their sits. A warm hand was placed on his shoulder and he saw Henry before him,"Hey, are you with us?" He asked mockingly.  
Kyuhyun smiled in embarrassment a little, and stretched while standing up,"Is it finally over?" He asked the shorter male.  
"Yeah, now it's just two more days until the winter break." Henry smiled warmly, as he hung his arm over Kyuhyun's shoulders.  
This friendly act didn't escape Donghae's sight.

_"No, you can't sorry. Now you officially complimented me, Kyu." Donghae wrapped his arms around the latter, hugging his broad shoulders,"Does that mean we're friends?"_   
_He tried to hint, to take baby steps towards the other. He didn't want to startle the male, especially when going bold didn't work out that well._   
_"What? You're not going to make a smart-ass comment?" Donghae acted surprised,"You know, you acted this way last time too, you aren't answering me." He slipped his hand into the brown locks and playfully moved his fingers in between them,"I haven't received a yes or a no, for my question, Kyu."_   
_Donghae hoped that this little gesture wasn't too much. Even though he didn't want to play with the male, he didn't want him to take his bashful behavior so. The soft locks that entwined around his slender fingers felt right, and Donghae hoped he could keep this position for a while without making it odd._   
_"I..guess.." Kyuhyun tried to sign something coherent, but was low on words,"I think.."_   
_TIt amused the blond to see him getting frustrated that way. Perhaps it meant he held the same feelings for him?_   
_"Yeah." At last came the answer that Donghae was pleading to receive._   
_His grin widened, as he brushed softly Kyuhyun's bangs from his forehead. Then, silently and with a swift motion he kissed his left temple._

The blond male tried to get rid of the memory, or at least bury it deep enough until he saw Kyuhyun to be ready.  
He noticed Hyukjae joining him at his side, as well as Sungmin. The two seemed amused. Both grinning with joy from Donghae's appearance.  
"That's cute, he's jealous." Sungmin whispered to the slender male as he snickered,"Afraid deaf-guy is seeing anyone?" He tapped Donghae's shoulder.  
"Not at all," The tall student sounded less confident than he wished he was, since what his friend said wasn't far from truth.

_"Donghae?" Kyuhyun said quietly, for once, speaking clearly. He turned to face the other male that he just received a kiss from._   
_The blond smiled as he moved from the latter, looking into the dark eyes that intoxicated him,"Hmm?" He questioned._   
_"Don't you..." He signed, giving up on words,"Think it's odd? Befriending someone like me?"_   
_"What do you mean by someone like you?" He rose his eyebrow as he kept looking at Kyuhyun's dark orbs._   
_"Someone that's.. broken." Kyuhyun said with a sad sigh he didn't know he was holding._   
_It made Donghae's heart ache._

Strolling down the hallway, they finally reached their locker. Henry checked himself in the small mirror that was attached to his storage. He wanted to try out blue hair for a while now, so he spent a few good minutes every break to imagine himself with blue hair instead of the toned-down blond he owns now.  
"Stare a little bit more and it'll suck you in." Kyuhyun joked, opening his locker and placing everything in place.  
"At least I won't have to listen to boring literature. It's the worst class of them all." He groaned in irritation,"I don't understand why do I have to go through with this torture?"  
"Because you failed last semester, if you would have studied, you wouldn't have to do it." The brunet answered lightly, mocking his friend,"Besides, you could chose between literature and composition, you chose this hell for yourself." He chuckled.  
"Wow Kyuhyun, thank you so much I just really needed this reminder." He snarled, locking the storage with a slam.  
"What friends are for?" He asked nonchalantly with an amused smile.

_"Kyuhyun..." Donghae cleared his tears with his thumbs,"You're not.. broken." He said softly, not wanting to show the male how much it pained to see him in this situation._   
_It was the first time Kyuhyun showed any emotion besides anger or nothing at all. Kyuhyun wasn't sure why he was reacting that way to Donghae's words and touch, but it made him relax._   
_"I want to play, I want to sing." He admitted, not even bothering to mouth his words, as he signed with shaking hands,"It used to be my dream." He dropped his look as he signed the last word._   
_This is too embarrassing, he thought. The way that Donghae looked at him reminded him of the days back in the hospital, when everyone was pitying him._   
_But there was something more to his look, to his gestures. Something that was warm and welcoming, and even though Kyuhyun's heart raced, it made him relax and give in the conversation._   
_When he saw that Donghae wasn't saying anything, he suddenly rose,"I'm sorry I bothered you,Donghae." He muttered, wiping away the cold tears,"I have to go, sorry." With that, he leaped towards the door, closing it quickly as he exited the room._   
_He was too vulnerable for his liking. He hadn't felt so vulnerable with anyone._

"Yah, if you keep loosing track I'll just leave!" Hyukjae whined. By the end of his story about that cute girl from guitar class, he noticed that his friend wasn't with him at all.  
"Sorry." He answered apologetically,"I just can't stop thinking about it." He let go of a sigh he didn't know he was holding. There's always something comforting in talking to Hyukjae, since he usually didn't care to tell him the truth as it is. Whether it meant to call him an idiot, or shout at him for acting wrongly.  
"Wow. That guy has you head over heels for him. What draws you to him, anyway?" At that remark, Donghae dropped his look sheepishly, then tried to trace anything but the other's face.  
"I guess that there are some things that can be explained." He joked, trying to avoid talking about anything regarding last night. They were at the school's yard, and unless he wanted to get another video snooped, it wasn't the wisest thing to talk about this subject in open space.  
"Like why does a person that can't hear gets so much joy from music." Donghae kicked a small stone above the soft snow they were walking on,"Or why does he think he's broken."  
Hyukjae laughed, and punched swiftly yet lightly the blond's shoulder blade,"You are so absolutely love-stuck. Do you even listen to yourself?"  
Listening to himself would be hard, since he was overwhelmed by emotions, trying to figure out anything that could make Kyuhyun happy and capable of singing again.

"I have an idea." He smiled at him after a short silence.


	5. Feel the sound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter, but the next one is going to be longish as this was preparation for what Kyu is about to experience...

"What am I doing here?" Kyuhyun looked at the other, with a confused expression decorating his face.

The music room was empty, since it was the weekend, and most students took the chance of the storm calming down to head to the nearest city. The school was partially empty, and partially filled with students who hadn't finished their work.  
And there were Donghae and Kyuhyun, who for some reason that Donghae refused to reveal to the other, dragged them to the music room in the main building.  
The halls, as expected, were empty of people and it helped Kyuhyun knowing no one would spread any other rumors about their occupation.

"I wanted to test something out." The blonde signed. He grabbed a few cords and connected them to the large amplifier in the center of the room. Kyuhyun was standing still quietly as he watched the male run around to find all the pieces to finally connect the humongous machine.  
After a few minutes, he returned to the other with a grin, showing the dark-haired one a microphone. That earned him another puzzled look as Kyuhyun took the microphone into his hands,"What do you want me to do?" He muttered.  
Donghae seemed pleased, and instead of answering him, he grabbed the other's hand and pressed it against the center of the large amplifier.  
"Just keep your hand there, alright? I'll sing something, and you tell me if you know it."  
Before Kyuhyun could sound any protest, the microphone was snatched away from his grasp, and Donghae headed to the far seat, turning away from his look.  
How bad can it be?

At first, he felt nothing familiar. Then, he reminded himself that he should concentrate instead of being snarky towards his friend. Kyuhyun closed his eyes, and with a deep breath he focused.  
The vibration the amplifier was giving off was very strange at the beginning of it, but with time, he noticed a pattern. His mind worked quickly a thoroughly to figure out whether or not does he recognizes the pattern.  
It was so familiar, but he couldn't connect a name to it.  
He took another deep breath, and concentrated even more, shutting out everything but the vibration his hand was sensing.

The pattern starts with a strong vibration, which meant it was a low key note. Then, it went higher as the motion was less felt. At the end, it returned to the strong buzzing.  
Only then, he realized that together with the feeling of the sound, and the pattern he figured out, his brain connected the dots and at last gave him a name.

"It's last year's best self-composed song, right?" He opened slowly his eyes, to meet the other's dark ones. Donghae was already beside him, as he finished singing not so long ago.  
"It's Heechul-Hyung 'This is Love', right?" Kyuhyun had very little hope whether he'll be right or not. But if there was something he learned about the male he was with, that no matter what he'd say, the response he will receive will be warm and welcoming. It was one of the little things that made his heart pound through his ears, a matter he hadn't spoke of to his friends yet.  
Donghae grinned triumphantly,"Correct. I was right."  
"You? I just had to listen to this and play little guessing game-" Before Kyuhyun could continue his rant, he was cut off by Donghae's hug. The other seemed so pleased and happy, it made his heart flutter, not with ache, not with pressure and anxiety, rather with satisfaction.  
"I thought that if you remember chords so clearly, and if you can understand patterns like this.." Donghae muttered, what took the other a few moments to take in and understand,"Maybe you can sing too."  
Kyuhyun felt his heart releasing an overwhelming loud beats.  
He should defiantly talk to his friends about this.

  
"Oh my god, Wookie, Kyu-hyung is in love!" Henry exclaimed loudly, and the smaller male that was sitting on Kyuhyun's bed clapped with joy,"That sounds just like being in love, Kyu. Your heartbeat, the fact that you tolerate his face and he wrote a song just for you! That's amazing."  
Kyuhyun made a puking sound. In love? No.  
He's that deaf guy that no one wants to be around because it's too hard to talk to him. He's that guy that always completes projects on his own. He's that guy that everyone think he's broken. He cannot be in love. Especially not with a music student, especially not with Donghae.  
He is the first person that approached him of his own will, and welcomed him so warmly, with so much understanding and compassion. He can't throw that away. He can't risk that.  
Kyuhyun just **can't.**  
"So how do I get rid of it?" He asked, trying to mask his agitating pressure.  
Ryeowook sighed,"Kyuhyun, it's a good thing, and from what you told us it sound like he's interested in you. You should try it out."  
"Oh, no. I can't do this whole love **thing**. I'm not good with it, and it always ends badly, I just--" Before he can find any more excuses, he meet the others' dissapproving glances. Kyuhyun knew he lost - from the very moment he talked to them about it. He shouldn't have told them that Donghae is helping him sing. He shouldn't have told them that his heart races every time he looks into his meaningful dark eyes.  
He shouldn't have told them that Donghae keeps lurking around him - hugging him, giving him soft kisses on the forehead and temples.

Being someone with very little social experience, he thought at first it was odd, but never questioned those little gestures. Partially, because he didn't want them to stop.

He hadn't meet Donghae since their meeting in the music room, and he began growing apprehensive. With each passing meeting, he feels more attracted to the male, wanting to spend more and more time around him. Just being with him, letting out smart comments about their ongoing conversations.

But on the first day as everyone returned to classes regularly, his plans changed.


	6. Bliss and rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introductions and plot twists  
> Who is the bad guy?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is. Very different from what originally I had in mind, but fun none the less.

The wet bangs stuck onto his forhead as he began to gently remove them and expand his vision. The cold air that raged around the dorms filled his lungs wholly until he felt content. The snow was replaced with cool rain, tapping all over the area, stinging like small knifes falling from the dull grey sky. 

Kyuhyun looked up, and for a single moment, the dark clouds reflected within his round choclate orbs. 

He shivered, as his thick clothes were not enough to stand against the biting cold of the season. He felt the wind merge with his temperature, reaching deep within his veins. It didn’t look like it would cease any time soon.

The small trip from the dorm to the music room was nothing compared to the joy he felt each time he allowed his voice to be free- to be heard.

Even though he did not want to admit so, Kyuhyun felt thankful for Donghae’s will to help. He couldn’t figure the man out completely, since no one tried so hard for him at all. Sure, Henry and Ryeowook were great friends and he found so much comfort in being with them.

But it felt _different_ with him.

Those unexplained heartbeats, those little gestures and this.. Attraction was new to him, and yet he couldn’t accept it and give it a name.

He wanted to simply make it stop from happening- love never ended for him well. He was always used, always thought to be easy prey for others. 

He was always the _problem_.

This time, Kyuhyun decided to avoid being hurt again. When Donghae searched for him and called him to come to the music room, he ignored him, or evaded his invitations, claiming he was busy with homework.

Even though the bitterness took over him- much like the piercing rain, he tried to convince himself that this is for the best. The isolation would only help him, and this was he could force Donghae to give up on him.

Only it wasn’t the situation.

 

Three days before their great party was about to come, Kyuhyun was drowning himself in work as usual. He walked to his locker, holding several books in his arms, trying to maintain balance of it all. Moving the weight from one hand to another, he finally reached the small storage. Kyuhyun sighed and looked at the lock. He didn’t think this through as he wished he would.

For long moments, the brown haired started thinking of different ways he could open the locker without letting go of the books. He began already engineering the way his foot would come up and turn the thing around, but it was cut short by two soft hands coming from behind him, opening the lock for him.

“Thanks…” He mumbled quietly, dropping his look as he pushed all of the items into the small space. When he was done, he turned around to meet two soft brown eyes, looking at him apprehensively.

“Kyu, are you alive?” Donghae smiled.

Kyuhyun felt a knot beginning to form in his chest.

“Yeah.. I, uh..” He tried to think of another excuse to get as far as he could from the other male,”Henry called me, so I really have to go .” He managed to say, turning around to go, only to be stopped when his arm was grabbed by the other’s warm hand.

“Let’s talk.” Donghae turned him around, not breaking their new eye contact.

Kyuhyun took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and finally replied coldly, with no emotion over his face,”No.”

As he was going to walk away, he got caught again, and he felt the knot pressing harder. At this rate, he will break and succumb to more pain.

“Come on, Kyu, it’s just a talk. Just for a minute.” The blond pleaded, searching for any type of warmth in the other’s expression.

With all the strength he had in his heart, he removed the male’s hand from his own. He didn’t even turn around this time. Kyuhyun walked away, feeling choked up. Why was this happening to him?

 

Later that evening, he was called to head outside with his friends, but the uneasy feeling inside his heart could not allow him. Kyuhyun couldn’t figure out what caused him more torture- being in love and be with his loved one, or being in love and rejecting it. Both situation caused him in the past so much pain it was hard to withstand it.

His eyes wandered to his night stand, and he opened the small drawer in it, retrieving a small black box. 

He sighed heavily, and opened it.

 

That night he almost used it again. That night he almost broke his promise to himself.

 

As he layed the box back inside his drawer, his eyes wandered to the window again. He looked at the drops lurking over the glass cover, acting as a wet and cold blanket, trapping what’s beneath it inside.

His thoughts were cut off as he felt the buzzing in his pocket. It was a message from Donghae.

 

_ Hey asshole, how long are you planning to ignore me? _

 

Kyuhyun’s hand trembled. He doesn’t have enough strength to keep Donghae out, doesn’t he?

 

_ I’m not ignoring you, I’m just caught in homework. _

 

He replied quickly, his slender digits shaking after every letter. How long can he continue lying to himself?

 

_ Homework my ass. Let’s talk. I’m outside your door so you can’t run away again. _

 

His eyes widened at the message. His head shot to the door’s direction, as his feet forced himself up.

The black box was inside the drawer, he reassured himself, double-checking yet again.

His lungs filled with the cool air in his room and he headed to the door.

Many emotions ran through his mind that moment, but the most aggressive one was fear. He feared Donghae, he feared his own heart. For how long will he push his love down.

As he opened the door slowly, he felt the knot in his chest tighten.

The blond man in front of him said something which he couldn’t get, since his mind was playing tricks on him.

Kyuhyun felt his heartbeat pulse between his reddish ears.

Donghae pushed him inside the room and invited himself in, what snapped the brown haired out of his trance.

“Sorry?” Kyuhyun finally asked,”I..didn’t get that..” He admitted, trying harder than ever to sound emotionless.

The taller looked at him with sad eyes,”I said, I don’t know what I’ve done to you that angered you that much.” The blond made sure to sign each and every word.

Something in the male in front of him didn’t seem quite right. Was Kyuhyun shaking?

Donghae scanned the man from head to toe, noticing his almost-pristine bubble that surrounded him.

He landed his hands over Kyuhyun’s shoulders, squeezing them lightly.

“Kyuhyun?” He asked in an apprehensive tone, noticing how the man stiffened in his arms.

After long moments of silence, the other finally spoke, every syllable sounding cold and trembling.

“I..I want you to leave,” He managed to mutter,”please…” He added, his voice betraying him and letting the other know that he was on the verge of crying.

The knot in his chest almost choking him, he searched for a quick way out. 

Everything about the blond was intoxicating- his smell, his eyes, his lips, the small gestures he made. It kept pulling Kyuhyun in, even though he tried so hard to keep away.

“No.” Donghae finally stated,”I won’t leave you.” He concluded and pulled the other in his arms, surrounding him with his own warmth.

“I can’t, Kyu.” He whispered to himself, thinking Kyuhyun won’t hear his silent confession.

“I can’t leave you, Kyu. I like you too much for that.”

 

Kyuhyun’s breath hitched.

He wasn’t dreaming, was he?

“Say that again.” The brown haired man forced Donghae away, resting his anxious arms over the other’s shoulders.

Donghae looked at him with slight surprise at the sudden reaction, trying to figure out what should he let him know.

When Kyuhyun didn’t get any answer, he pressed the man’s shoulders tighter, and repeated, his voice lower and sharper,”Say that again.”

There was silence. Long, excruciating silence. Donghae could hear how heavy and anxious Kyuhyun’s breath became. When the man’s face and voice shut all emotion, his body was acting otherwise, letting the taller know how much he wants to  _ hear _ those words, how much he wants to know-

“I **like** you Kyuhyun.”

His heart raced and the knot exploded within his limbs. He couldn’t keep holding himself back. That attraction was too great even for him. All the walls he tried so carefully construct around his heart fell down as if they were never there.

They locked eyes, and for the first time that night, Kyuhyun allowed himself to be happy.

His lips met the other’s warm ones, sealing that silent confession. His heart fluttered, and the joy that spread through every vein in his body was great. But with that joy, came great fear.

He pulled away the sweet kiss they shared, dropping his look. Not for long, as Donghae lifted his chin with his soft hand,”What’s the matter?.. Did you not like that?” He almost whispered against the man’s lips,”Don’t you want this?”

It was hard for Kyuhyun to admit it straight away, so he did what he knew best- he pushed the feeling down the throat, leaving it for better time. Without saying anything, he melted into Donghae’s thin line of lips, bringing them both closer, feeling their shared warmth radiating from the two entities.

Donghae ran his hand through the brunet’s bangs, moving them aside, making way for him to kiss the man’s forehead.

“Please don’t ask me to go, Kyu.” He muttered, his arms wrapped around the other’s broad shoulders,”I want to be near you. Ever since I got the chance to know you, I can’t stop it- Everything I want to do, everything I think about… It’s for you.” He admitted with a soft smile.

Kyuhyun shoved him away, trying to cover his crimson blush by dropping his head,”You’re so sappy…” He mumbled. The two shared a ringing laugh, and spent the rest of the night together.

  
  
  


A smug smile decorated the tall man’s lips, bringing out every good feature of his face. The thick, black sunglasses fit almost perfectly to the slim figure of his jaw. 

The uniform was sitting perfectly over his toned body- not too tight, but not too spacious. The tie was resting easily on his chest, and when he moved, it moved along the thick muscles.

“It has been a while..” He muttered in perfect chinese,”I’ve missed you, Donghai.” His lips curled upwards as he made his path to the dorm.

 

Soon enough, the rumor spread around like disease- all the girls in the dorm knew he had returned. The man was the most successful student thus far, being the first one to make debut while still in school. He was one of the foreigners, studying music while in Korea.

Zhou Mi was perfect in every aspect possible - he had the looks, the voice and the charisma.

All those made him extremely popular within students.

 

As he was unpacking the large suitcase, he wondered whether the situation was the same as he left. He and Donghae- well, it was only natural. The two most talented musicians, sharing love until he had to leave for the company. However, he promised to be true to Donghae, and be only his, even from afar.

 

That’s what made seeing the video of his past lover with another man so painful. Of course, people thought the two had broken up, and felt the need to let Zhou Mi know that his ex is now with a crippled deaf boy. 

Zhou Mi was many things, but he was never a man of anger.

 

But something snapped. Something sweet, caring and loving shattered inside of him, seeing that the promise he made so eagerly was broken so easily. For a moment, he hesitated whether or not returning was a wise idea. Then, the hesitation got replaced with sorrow. Was he not enough for Donghae to wait for him?

Then, it was replaced with anger, seeking revenge.

 

Cho Kyuhyun. That was the monster’s name. The one that lured Donghae away from Zhou Mi. The one that made his lover break what he was holding onto so dearly.

 

Zhou Mi grabbed his phone and called the first person he had in mind.

 

_ I need you to do me a favor. _


	7. Tell me honestly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zhou Mi's return already starts to sink in Hae's heart. What will he do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, sorry for the short chapter, it just feels more right like this. Don't worry, though! I am updating occasionally!

He stopped the video, rewinding it back to the beginning. It was the fifth time he had watched it. With each time, he felt his heart clench tight in his chest, suffocating him. Thankfully, there was no one around to see his eyes watering up. He felt ashamed that he was replaced with that man.   
Zhou Mi grabbed his water bottle and plucked his earphones in, heading out of the dorm. Tomorrow the school will be left clear of supervisors, what makes it the perfect time to seek out revenge.  
Even though the thought of revenge was wrong in his mind, the anger that originated this emotion, wasn’t wrong. It felt right.   
The call yesterday made him relax a little, knowing that in no time Donghae would be his again. 

 

Donghae’s eyes scanned the class’ door a few times before entering. Behind him, Sungmin and Hyukjae snuck hesitated glances between them. From the very beginning it was clear to them that Zhou Mi’s return means only trouble. Even back then when the two were dating, Zhou Mi was in love with Donghae- but it wasn’t alike for the other.  
The first time Donghae truly felt like he  _ should _ have felt back then, was the previous night, when he kissed Kyuhyun.  
He broke the promise they made long ago, but he was finally content with his emotions. 

 

As soon as their eyes met, he could sense many overwhelming feelings gush from the male’s dark orbs.   
“You’re back?” He managed to mutter, taken back by the image in front of him. Donghae scanned the male from head to toe, taking in all of the small details of Zhou Mi.  
“You changed your hair.” There was something caring in the man’s voice, but it was well kept- he let out only small amounts of it, for his own good.  
The taller almost placed his hand over the blond’s soft bangs, but the self restraint he had was larger than his need.  
“Let’s talk.” Donghae noticed the hesitation in the other’s eyes, and decided that it’s best to clear everything now.  
“There’s nothing to talk about, Hae.” The coldness in Zhou Mi’s voice shook Donghae’s insides. Momentarily, the tall black hair man changed from being warm to blocking everything.   
The venom in his words was spreading across Donghae’s heart, and caused him to tremble in fear. He has never seen the other like this.  
“Don’t worry, I’m not mad at you.” He said in poisonous sweetness, then fled the classroom, only to bump into another student at the door.  
Midway through apologizing, Zhou Mi stopped and glared. He met the man’s almond eyes, releasing silent anger and rage.   
“Sorry…” Kyuhyun bowed apologetically and snuck past the tall man into the classroom.

 

It seemed that the rain finally stopped and the dullness of the sky lessened a little. The clouds were still covering the earth from the sun but now, instead of a soothing blanket of grey, it changed to smokey trapping barriers. That what Kyuhyun was thinking about as he kept dazing off in the last class for the day.   
Something in the air was anxious and apprehensive, causing many students to whisper, what he hated. The male absentmindedly followed one of the last raindrops that were on the classroom’s window, looking at how it slowly sinks, until it dissolves.     
When people finally began to get up, he kept staring outside, feeling that this odd aura coming from his classmates was aiding the weather in making him feel suffocated.   
  
Donghae hadn’t said much about Zhou Mi since he heard that he returned, but even Kyuhyun could understand that the situation can’t be easy. Although he was scared to get pulled into the matter, he wanted to be there for Donghae, to let him know that he can rely on him.   
Sadly, he didn’t believe he could assist in any way.   
When Kyuhyun was finally beginning to hope to have some love in his life, this warm ray of light was blocked by the tall mountain called Zhou Mi. He didn’t know what to think of the intimidating male, since they haven’t really spoke to one another. However, rumors spread fast - whether it was the video, or the fact that Donghae wasn’t ashamed to admit that he liked Kyuhyun.   
  
This sensation was alien to him, having someone that likes you regardless of the problems you’re facing. Liking you because of the problems you own.   
  
When Kyuhyun snapped out of his daydream, he found himself in the empty classroom, not even Henry or Ryeowook waited for him. He sighed and began packing his things as he felt a hand placed on his shoulder. The male halted and stiffened. Then, after a moment, he turned around slowly.   
  
“You can understand me like this, right?” The man in front of him spoke carefully. He had a worried expression, whether it was for Kyuhyun, or that he will be caught talking to the troublemaker.   
Kyuhyun nodded slowly and apologetically dropped his look,”Do you need something, Sungmin?” He muttered, signing along to calm himself down.   
The blond haired man in front of him glanced both ways to make sure there wasn’t anyone else around before he let out the air he was holding,”I’m warning you, fish-boy.”    
Kyuhyun swallowed his saliva and followed the other’s lips carefully. The weird feeling he had that day wasn’t so odd after all.   
“Zhou Mi doesn’t like you. He doesn’t like when people touch his toys.”  
  
“Donghae **isn’t** a toy.” He said back quickly, not understanding where he had the courage to speak so freely to one of his lover’s friends,”He..made the decision himslef.”   
“Trust me, fish-boy, I know.” Sungmin sighed heavily and crossed his arms over his chest,”I just don’t think you know what Donghae was like back at the day with Zhou Mi. He was stupid,” His lips quirked upwards a little in amusement,”Not the type of stupid he is now, but exceptionally stupid. He didn’t believe in his abillities as a musician, nor as a lover. Zhou Mi took advantage of that and made him his pet. Hae was head over heels for the man - he did everything for him. It was really bad.” Sungmin took the liberty to look away from Kyuhyun, his expression becoming dark,”Hae is kind, but stupid.”   
Kyuhyun blinked a few times, taking in all the information. His almond eyes wore a confused, dim fog over their usual shine.  
  
“Why are you telling me this?” He said without signing.   
The blonde smiled warmly at the other and perked up from the table he was leaning on,”Because I think you might be good for this stupid five year old.” He said warmly, his eyes getting soft lines of smiling,”Don’t let Zhou Mi take Donghae away from you. I’m..” He hesitated,”Sort of on your side, as Hae’s friend.” He concluded with a smile. Sungmin bowed, and left quietly. 

It was both a warning and both a call for friendship. 

The talk with Sungmin made the man understand how little he actually knew about his new.. Lover. Whenever he talked to him, he didn’t see any self doubt, or whatever Sungmin had described. Was it all a facade? Or perhaps it was Donghae learning more about himself?   
Whichever it was, it made Kyuhyun confused.   


 

  
“You can’t be serious, right?” He snarled,”This is what you’re dating now? This-- this **crippled** boy?” He asked in pure disbelief.    
Donghae stared at the man, clenching teeth and fists,”Kyuhyun **isn’t** crippled. Why is it so hard for you to understand it?” He snapped back, his slim fingers becoming almost white from the pressure.   
“Because, Hae, I remember that we--- **you** promised something. If you’re not going to upkeep it out of sheer respect, then I will be bound to teach you a lesson.” The tall black-haired man finally calmed down, but it was even more scary when he did. His words were calculated, his lips moving by his brain’s demand, while his heart was left in cold chains.   
“Do whatever you want, Zhou Mi. Just don’t drag Kyuhyun into this. He’s been through enough.” Donghae tried to sound calmer than he really was.   
“Oh no,” The taller smiled viciously, standing up from the bench he was sitting on, stretching his limbs a little,”You don’t get to tell me how to play in **my** playground. I thought you loved me. I, at least loved you. I still do. But you hurt me and now you will know how it feels to have the dearest thing to your heart being taken away.” Zhou Mi said with almost content, as the viciousness and poison were dropping from his vocals, being replaced with something similar to pride.   
Then, the words clicked in Donghae’s mind. When they did, his pupils expanded in fear. He looked at the man, his breath short and intimidated,”Zhou Mi…” He began with a trembling whisper,”What did you do?” 


	8. Counting sheeps, part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double upload! Tomorrow I will upload the second part of the title!

“Okay,” Donghae’s almond eyes were pleading in misery,”You were right MiMi…” He tried to sound soothing and warm, but couldn’t. He took a deep breath, hoping that his already damp and red eyes won’t betray him like his trembling voice and shaking hands were.   
“I was stupid to break our--  **my** promise.” The blond admitted quietly, not believing that those words actually escaped his thin lips.   
“Kyuhyun was nothing.” He felt how every word he managed to coherently say stabbed his aching heart, twisting in the pain like daggers in an open wound. How could it go so wrong?   
“Kyuhyun was nothing compared to you, MiMi…” The man smiled in melancholy, taking further steps towards the taller,”I..” He tried to find the words he has lost.   
“I love you MiMi.. I’ll come back to you, just…” Donghae felt tears building at the corner of his eye,”Just don’t do this anymore.. You don’t have to, not anymore..” He laid his hand over the other’s cheek, caressing it through his hands tremors.   
He lost.

  
  


Kyuhyun woke up from the regular phone’s buzzing, taking his time in opening his eyes and adjusting to the ray of sun that hit directly over his chocolate eyes. He groaned, stretching in his bed, slowly sitting up, the thick blanket sliding off to his hips, uncovering his naked body. He wasn’t the one to show off his toned body, considering the large scar he had over his stomach. However, when he slept he prefered to be naked, actually letting his body be free of any shameful covers.    
Even when he had to attend sports class, he took extra care in refusing taking off his shirt, no matter how hot the day was. No matter how much his classmates teased him and called him a nun.   
The scar stretched along with his defined muscles as he finally sat, leaning against the wall behind him. Kyuhyun grabbed his phone and checked for any new messages, noticing the few from Ryeowook and Henry, and two more from Donghae. He smiled softly as he clicked on Donghae’s name.   
  
_ Good Night! I hope we can hang out tomorrow. I mean, I will drag you to hang out with me. Is that clear? _ __   
  
The man chuckled, his shoulders relaxing as he continued to the next message from him.   
  
__ Sorry. Did that come out too harsh? Anyway, I’ll be at your door tomorrow around 11. Sounds reasonable? Hyukjae is throwing a party later so we can head there once you’ll get tired of me.   
  
Kyuhyun smiled, blushing. His eyes trailed up from the screen, looking at some far point in the distance. He won’t admit it, but he liked how Donghae treated him. Caring, loving and less teasing. A small sigh of content escaped his plump lips and he decided it was a good time to get up, and get dressed.  
As he covered himself with a black plain shirt and another deep blue jacket above it, he glanced over to the nightstand. Kyuhyun reassured himself that the black box was still indeed there, untouched. No matter how much he hated what the box held, it was dear to him.

 

When the clock hit 11, Kyuhyun stood skittish next to his room’s door, excited to meet Donghae again.  
He gave a heads up to Ryeowook and Henry that they will be attending Hyukjae’s party later on, even though he hated interacting with so many people around him. The two agreed with no question, deciding to hang out before the party at the roof of the main building.  
The man thought that his friends were quiet childish to go sitting on rooftops, but whatever made them happy made him happy as well. The few last days caused the dark haired become happier, smiling more, being more tolerant towards his friends and classmates. Even though he did not want to say so, it was all because of Donghae.

 

“Hello?” The blond haired man waved his arms in front of the dazed Kyuhyun. A smile stretched over his thin lips, trying to catch the other’s attention.  
“Oh, Donghae, I didn’t…” He mumbled quietly,”I didn’t notice you, sorry.” The dark haired one dropped his look sheepishly. It didn’t last long, as he felt two warm arms wrap around his body, tugging him closer.  
“It’s alright. Is something bothering you?” Donghae tried to look cheerful for him, giving the man a slight peck on his plump lips.  
Kyuhyun, who was mesmerized by the small kiss slowly shook his head,”It’s new..” He admitted, only signing.  
Then, he noticed the smirk on his lover’s face. Donghae caressed his cheek, feeling the cold skin over his warm touch,”We should get you used to it, no?” He said softly, meeting the shorter’s glance. The blond’s eyes held a new kind of sparkle- something that the other couldn’t yet put his finger over it’s classification.   
Kyuhyun’s mouth went dry from the look, but he tried to swallow nonetheless. He felt as his face became hotter as he was nodding slowly.

 

That was all that Donghae needed.  
Without a second thought, he crashed their lips together in a silent mewl of need. His hands trailing up to cup the other’s cheeks, forcing him to stay close as Donghae began exploring the man’s mouth.  
Kyuhyun looked bewildered to say the least, but played along, doing what felt most natural to him.  
Donghae felt his lover’s hands rest on his chest, clinging to it lightly. The cold touch made him shudder, but the excitement of Kyuhyun trying to explore him made him jittery. Swiftly, he pulled away, taking the liberty of pushing the man in front of him to his bed. He followed quickly after, catching him between his toned arms. The look his lover had beneath him made Donghae become almost addicted to the intoxicating emotion that it unveiled.

 

“Fuck, Kyu-” He muttered, holding himself back. He shut his eyes, trying to focus. All he wanted to do was to see the man beneath him moan for him. He wanted to see him become tainted with Donghae’s scent.  
When he opened his eyes again, he saw the innocent look in his almond eyes.  
“It’s okay…” Kyuhyun smiled shyly, but that’s the only thing he could do.   
Donghae lowered himself to the other’s neck and gave it a small nibble, toying with the sensitive skin there.  
“Hae-” The brown haired breathly whispered, placing his arms on his lover’s chest. It made Donghae lust for more, even though he shouldn’t.  
He pulled away, taking in the sight. He said nothing as he was in loss of words. His warm and soft hands trailed to beneath the man’s shirt, slightly pulling it up.  
“No…” Kyuhyun pleaded sadly, covering the unveiled area of his scar,”You won’t like it.”  
Donghae smiled softly,”What makes you think that?” He signed, not moving his lips,”You’re beautiful.”  
He saw how red Kyuhyun had become and how his head jolted aside, avoiding Donghae’s look.  
“Please? I promise I won’t dislike it.” He tried to catch the man’s eyes, stroking slowly his cheek, then proceeding to brush his fingers through his hair.  
After a few moments, he heard in a small voice,”Okay. But you better keep your promise.”  
Donghae smirked, and for the first time he saw Kyuhyun’s body. His finger trailed over the defined muscles over his lover’s stomach, going up to his chest and shoulders.  
The blond contemplated whether or not should he ask about the scar, figuring that it was the reason Kyuhyun didn’t want to show his body in first place.  
“See? I told you I won’t dislike it.” He chirped cheerfully, giving another soft peck on the other’s plump lips.  
“But..the scar, isn’t it ugly?” The man beneath him signed, being in completely awe.  
Donghae shook his head,”How can something related to you be ugly?”  
Kyuhyun made a disgusted face,”Stop being corny!” He pushed his lover a little, trying to get up from his vertical position. He was pushed back straight away.   


“You didn’t let me finish.” The blond smirked, “Or do you want me to stop?” The heated look Kyuhyun received made him become hypnotized within the man’s eyes. Dark orbs that pulled him in, making every part of his body become hot, insanely hot. It was the first time he felt anything like that.  
Sheepishly, he shook his head,”I..I want you to continue.” His hands were shaking as he signed, as he thought about all the new sensations he was about to explore.

  
  


Zhou Mi rolled his eyes for the tenth time,”Well? Are you serious? You couldn’t get it?” The tall man folded his arms in anger,”How hard can it be to just do it? If I won’t have that by tonight everything will go sour.” He tried to explain calmly.  
The matter that his past lover caused was now much more about pride and less about anything else.  
Siwon sighed,”Listen, if you’re gonna act like that then forget about my help. I’m only doing this because we both have a similar goal, which is breaking them apart.” His voice was cold and sharp, and at the state he currently was no one would have dared to say anything. But Zhou Mi didn’t care. His pride has been hurt and his love has been snatched away from him. He would use anyone to make his position clear.  
“You’re right, Siwon.” He hummed, letting out the breath he was holding,”I’m sorry. But honestly, if we don’t get that by tonight, then I’m not going to have Donghae back, and you can forget about your chance with the deaf boy.”  
“Kyuhyun.” Siwon corrected him angrily,”His name is Cho Kyuhyun, and you better start respecting him if you want me in.”


	9. Counting Sheeps, part 2

They sat on the bed, both looking at the floor, trying to find the correct words to say. Both half naked, but decided not to go any further.

Donghae hummed, brushing his fingers through his light hair, thinking what should he tell the other. 

After a silent short while, he finally turned to Kyuhyun whose flushed face made his heart pick up its pace.

“Where did you get the scar?” He signed, pointing afterwards at the man’s stomach.

Kyuhyun finally looked him in the eyes, and there was pain in his expression,”It’s from the accident..” He began explaining,”The reason I’m  _ broken _ like this is because of that accident too.” 

It made Donghae’s heart ache, as he wanted to do nothing but convince the other that he is not broken, nor less than anyone else. His sad expression was caught in the brown haired man’s eyes and he continued explaining.

“We were riding back from a trip, my mom and I. The wheel just went out of place and we flipped.” He sighed,”My mom took minor damage, but as you can see..” Kyuhyun gestured at himself,”I lost my hearing and I lost my voice. I became nothing.”

“Stop it.” The blond commanded and pulled his lover into a warm hug,”You’re not nothing, and we found your voice, again. I just..” He swallowed, gathering courage,”I just want you to know that I don’t see you like that. No one does.”

Kyuhyun smiled sadly,”Thank you.. Really.” He pecked the other’s cheek. The male thought for a while, then came up with an idea.

“I want to show you something, but you can’t tell about this to anyone.”

Donghae nodded and watched how his lover bring out a small black box out of the night stand.

 

Usually, Siwon was calm and confident. He had no problem whatsoever in his studies, nor with his friends. People around him learned to respect him both because of his kind nature, and due to his irreplaceable aura. Sure, he came from a rich family and that helped greatly when he wanted to attract someone’s heart. But it was too easy, nothing he ever came across really caught his eye and he spent many days in discontent.

That is, until he found the missing piece to his puzzle. At first, he couldn’t bring himself to talk to him, considering he didn’t know how. After a few short calls he managed to get himself a teacher for sign language, and in no time he was fluent.

But then, when he finally decided to talk to the man, he found out that he is in someone else’s arms.

Siwon was anything but reluctant to give up. Whatever he wants, he will get, even if that means that he will have to hurt him a little.

He sat on the black bed, hands folded over his chest. His eyes trailed the piece of paper in front of him. The man didn’t like Zhou Mi to say the least, but if there was anything that he learned from the successful businessman his father is, is that sometimes, you have to do things you don’t want to in order to get yourself a good place. When the man approached him a few days ago, explaining to him the situation, Siwon was surprised, something he rarely feels.

He was surprised that Zhou Mi noticed the way he looked at Kyuhyun, and that he decided to use it for his own good. He admired the act, but Zhou Mi isn’t an easy person.

  
  


 

“This is my most valuable possession.” Kyuhyun explained the blond haired, who looked at him with a puzzled expression. The man opened the black box and handed it to the other, gently.

“When I was in the hospital, I met a girl who was born with hearing disability. She had a few other problems too, but I got to know her through speech correction class.” Kyuhyun’s voice was soft, he rarely spoke in that manner.

“Back then I refused to join classes because I hated how I couldn’t do anything. The girl saw that, and we became friends really fast.” He smiled honestly.

His eyes fixed on the item lying inside the box, he continued,”Eventually we were scheduled a surgery on the same day, and she gave me this before she went in.” He picked the small device from within the box,”After the surgery I managed to retrieve very little hearing, and I could use an hearing aid to become ‘normal’.” Kyuhyun’s expression darkened, and he let out a deep sigh,”But the girl didn’t make it. I couldn’t bring myself to use an hearing aid after that, because I made it, and she didn’t. She died when she was 16.”

Donghae’s eyes widened at the large intake of information. He looked at the hearing aid in disbelief, then traced back to Kyuhyun’s damp eyes. He was truly speechless, feeling both great grief in his lover’s words, but also honor because he saw Kyuhyun open up to him.

He wiped the soft tears that trailed down on the man’s warm cheeks. He gave him a welcoming look, as he faced directly the other’s chocolate eyes. 

“It’s..not your fault.” Donghae almost whispered,”Those things are not in our control, Kyu..” He kept caressing the other’s cheeks,”The girl probably would have wanted you to use that, otherwise there is no reason she would have gave that to you.” He tried to reason.

Kyuhyun smiled,”It would feel like betraying her. Why did I get the chance, and she didn’t? Why would she give me this?” He wrapped his fingers around the device.

“Maybe she knew she won’t make it.” Donghae said calmly.

Kyuhyun sighed,”Either way, I keep it treasured in her memory. Maybe I will use it someday, but it feels too wrong right now.”

He wanted to continue talking, but felt thin lips catching his plump ones. He gave into the intoxicating sweet kiss, and when the blond male pulled away he looked at him in surprise.

“Put it on tonight, at the party. Let her memory see some good fresh memories.”

 

 

When the sun began setting and the frost took over the school ground again, most of the students were already heading back from their day off. But on the third floor, in the large auditorium, people began gathering speakers and ridiculous amount of alcohol.

Soon enough, people came flooding in, each one taking his place in the party. The music was loud, forcing the students to shout in order for anyone to hear anything.

But there was something more than just sheer joy of the party- excitement and anticipation.

Something is going to happen, but no one could say it out loud.

Everyone knew Zhou Mi would turn up in the party, considering he was a bit of a party animal himself, but most students questioned whether or not Donghae and Kyuhyun would have the courage to come.

 

Zhou Mi stood idly next to some girl from art class, half listening to her continuous chatter, and half eyeing Siwon in the other corner. He saw the tall man nod, gesturing with his head at a small black box.

Zhou Mi’s smile widened, and after excusing himself from the human form of a headache, he reached to stand next to Siwon.

“Is this it?” The tall black haired one asked, his voice holding excitement in it.

Siwon nodded,”Yes. But you should know, I have a bad feeling about this. I don’t agree with your ways of getting what you want.”

“Good thing you don’t have to agree with me, you just have to do it.” Zhou Mi hummed happily,”I’ll start looking for the-” He almost said deaf boy again, but reminded himself that he shouldn’t anger his partner,”For Kyuhyun. Text me if you find him before I do.”

 

 

Donghae’s hand was firmly holding his hand as they entered the party, trying to find a decent place to wait for their friends.

“Are you sure this is a good idea? Isn’t.. Isn’t Zhou Mi here?” Kyuhyun signed, not bothering to speak.

Donghae thought about the conversation he had with his former lover and felt a bit of fear in heart. He was sure he would do something, he wasn’t sure what, and if put him more on edge than ever.

Back at the day, Zhou Mi would emotionally strain him- blaming him for any problem their relationship had, and he quietly agreed, always taking responsibility for it. He was constantly told by his friends that Zhou Mi was destroying him, but love made him blind.

“Don’t worry. I will handle it if anything happens.” He tried to be reassuring, hoping to leave Kyuhyun out of his old mess,”Where’s Sungmin? He should have been here already.” He hummed, searching through the crowd. The blond turned to Kyuhyun,”I’ll be right back, I’m going to find him and Hyuk.” He smiled, and soon enough disappeared into the crowd.

 

Kyuhyun lowered his head sheepishly. Even though Donghae tried to convince him to put the hearing aid, he couldn’t, it was too early for him.

He grabbed a bottle of beer from the table, and as soon as he opened it, he jumped in surprise when he felt a hand over his shoulder.

“Hi.” Siwon signed with a smile,”Are you alone here?” He asked calmly.

Kyuhyun’s almond eyes stared directly to the tall male in front of him, scanning the sight. He was sure he had seen him somewhere, but couldn’t tell right away where. 

“No, I’m here with some friends. Who are you?..” He raised his eyebrow, taking a sip from the bottle.

“I’m Choi Siwon, I study music. You’re Cho Kyuhyun, right?” He shifted to become closer to him.

Kyuhyun nodded,”Everyone seems to know me after the video..” He let out a sigh, and took another sip.

Siwon laughed,”Actually, I was meaning to talk to you for some time, but I figured I should learn how to sign before.”

The shorter man laughed as well,”That’s funny, it’s exactly what Donghae said.”

The taller felt a pinch in his heart, but it was enough to remind him that he should focus on the plan, rather than just talking to him. He will have plenty of time to do that later.

“I want to show you something.” He signed, and quickly after, grabbed Kyuhyun’s arm, pulling him behind him. 

 

Zhou Mi saw the sight and smirked from afar. Everything is going just right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared, next chapter you will require tissues.


	10. 이제, 우리

Siwon led him to another corner of the large auditorium, where Zhou Mi has been waiting. Kyuhyun was forced to follow, having his arm grabbed and pulled right after.    
The corner was dark, and people seemed to stand far away from it, focusing on the intense beats of music.    
Zhou Mi was leaning against the wall, his arms crossed and a smug smile on his lips.   
“Cho Kyuhyun,” He said as the two reached there. He could notice how tense the shorter man had become- his eyes widening and his body stiffening. Kyuhyun bowed lightly and looked at the two, confused.   
“We can do this the easy way, or the hard way. What do you prefer?” Zhou Mi hummed, turning his attention away from the brown haired to his hand. It was his only way to hold himself back from erupting with anger and hatred.   
“I..” Kyuhyun muttered,”I don’t understand?” His sepia eyes searched for an explanation within Siwon or the other, which he didn’t dare to look straight in the face.   
“Then I’ll explain,” Zhou Mi pushed himself from the wall, unveiling the small black box he was hiding behind his legs.   
Kyuhyun froze. He couldn’t see anything else but the box, not bothering to even pay attention to what Zhou Mi has been saying. He felt fear, he also felt anger. When he tried to launch for the box and take it away, he was stopped by Siwon’s strong arm, keeping him in place.   
“That’s not how you play, Cho Kyuhyun.” The brown haired finally managed to focus on Zhou Mi’s lips,”You took something important from me, and now I’m taking something important from you. Doesn’t it seem fair?” Zhou Mi picked up the box, shaking it a little and Kyuhyun felt how air escaped his lungs with each shake.   
“Give-- Give that back!” He tried to shout, but it was probably too incoherent for anyone to understand.   
“You want that back?” Zhou Mi asked with a smirk, and just as he planned, he saw Donghae’s terror stricken face. The blond was getting closer from behind his lover and Zhou Mi took the liberty to threaten them with the box.   
“Zhou Mi, you’re walking on thin ice.” Donghae said coldly, not moving a step closer, fearing that he will act out of instinct.   
“Okay then, let’s make a deal. I will stop, and give you everything back, and you will give me whatever I lost back. Isn’t that fair?” He asked in a venomous tone.   
Donghae clenched his teeth and fists,”I’m not an item to be given to someone. I chose Kyuhyun because he listened to me, and he didn’t treat me like a god-damned pet!” The blond shouted back.   
“Very well. But Remember what  **you** chose.” Zhou Mi grinned viciously.   
  
It was as if everything was slowed down at least 20 times. Donghae tried to get to Zhou Mi while Kyuhyun was trying to break free from Siwon’s hold. Siwon was struggling, looking at the man in his arms.   
And then, there was a small cracking sound as the box hit the ground, and its broken content spilled on the floor.   
Time stopped, and everyone just ceased moving. Four pairs of eyes were staring at a now-broken hearing aid, lying on the wooden floor.    
Kyuhyun finally managed to release himself from the taller’s hold, and he dropped to his knees, looking at what was once a memory of his friend.   
“Kyu..” Donghae ran beside him, wrapping an arm around him and tugging him closer as he watched the other two leave. Zhou Mi got what he wanted for now, and it was to devastate Kyuhyun.   
“It’s..It’s broken.” Kyuhyun huffed, holding back tears as he collected pieces into the box again,”Her…” He tried to mutter,”She..” He felt cold drops pass over his cheeks, and onto the soft inner of the box.    
“Kyuhyun, I’m so sorry-” Donghae tried to sound soothing, but it was nothing alike. He was afraid to say the least.   
“ **You’re** sorry?” Kyuhyun asked in disbelief,” **You’re** sorry, Donghae? This is all because of  **you** !” He roared at the other, pushing away the arm around him,”Her memory is now  **gone** because of  **you!** ”   
“Kyuhyun I didn’t-” Donghae felt how blades pierce his heart, hearing those words.   
“I don’t want this anymore if this is what it takes! Get away from me and  **leave me alone!** ” Kyuhyun was gone in less than a moment, running to the rainy outside. He felt how the damp locks of hair over his eyes, trailing right above the tears that kept coming.   
This is the reason he wasn’t trusting anyone.   
This is the reason he wasn’t allowing himself to love.

 

Ryeowook eyed Henry, giving him a defeated look. In return, the short blond haired man shook his head, patting Kyuhyun’s back a little more.

He wasn’t willing to talk about the incident, but whatever has happened, it hurt Kyuhyun deeply and it was enough for his friends to offer their help. They weren’t questioning him when he stormed out of the party, nor when he reached his room, breaking down in tears and looking at his hands in the most pure grief.

“Try to call Donghae?” Henry offered in sign. He had never seen Kyuhyun act so isolated, even before he started dating Donghae. It seemed like the crying male couldn’t understand what was going around him, and he cared even less. If there was someone to succeed in accessing him, it was his lover.

Ryeowook nodded, and soon enough dialed the number, waiting skittish while marching back and forth. The only sound besides call was Kuyuhyun’s sobs and deep breaths.

“Yes?” An unfamiliar voice answered. Ryeowook took a look at the screen, double checking that it was indeed the correct number.

“Is this not Lee Donghae’s phone?” He questioned carefully.

“Yes. Yes it is, this is his boyfriend talking.” Ryeowook heard the smug voice on the other line and tensed. Nonetheless, he played along to understand things better.

“Oh,” He said like it was obvious,”Well, can I talk to him?” The male heard the phone being delivered from one to another, what made him even more confused. Was Donghae double-timing?

“Hello?” Donghae finally answered. It was his voice, but it sounded nothing like him. 

“Oh Donghae, I just called to ask if everything between you and Kyu is alright?” Ryeowook was treading on ice, trying to get the most out of this. He had a feeling he wouldn’t like the answer coming, and he was right.

“Zhou Mi doesn’t allow me to go near him since he’s a bad influence for our relationship.” There was a cold silence between them as Ryeowook’s eyes expanded like he never thought they would. He received a curious ‘What?’ from Henry but said nothing.

“Please don’t call me on this matter anymore.” Donghae said lacking emotion. Then, he hung up, leaving Ryeowook in awe.

  
  


As Kyuhyun escaped the party, Donghae was left there all alone. He looked miserably at his hands, still leaning on his knees. This is what Zhou Mi meant. 

If he wasn’t obedient, he would get punished. Or worse- Kyuhyun would take the penalty. The strong beats of music felt out of place, and the massive amount of people felt like they were closing on him. After a while, sulking, he managed to stand up, only to see a dark figure in front of him. But he recognized the face- the sharp jaw, the almost teasing gleam in his eyes.

“So, do you feel like you learned your lesson or do you need another round of punishment to keep up your words?” Each sound Zhou Mi made caused the wound in his heart to become even greater. 

What does he have left? Kyuhyun now hated him, but if he will try to come near him again, Zhou Mi will find another way to hurt him. 

There was only one choice to protect Kyuhyun from this.

“Okay,” Donghae’s almond eyes were pleading in misery,”You were right MiMi…” He tried to sound soothing and warm, but couldn’t. He took a deep breath, hoping that his already damp and red eyes won’t betray him like his trembling voice and shaking hands were.   
“I was stupid to break our--  **my** promise.” The blond admitted quietly, not believing that those words actually escaped his thin lips.   
“Kyuhyun was nothing.” He felt how every word he managed to coherently say stabbed his aching heart, twisting in the pain like daggers in an open wound. How could it go so wrong?   
“Kyuhyun was nothing compared to you, MiMi…” The man smiled in melancholy, taking further steps towards the taller,”I..” He tried to find the words he has lost.   
“I love you MiMi.. I’ll come back to you, just…” Donghae felt tears building at the corner of his eye,”Just don’t do this anymore.. You don’t have to, not anymore..” He laid his hand over the other’s cheek, caressing it through his hands tremors.   
He lost.

  
  
  


“I have a really odd feeling about this, Henry.” Ryeowook confessed, walking back and forth in the hallway.

“What makes you say that?” The blond followed the other like he was watching a ping pong match.

“When I called Donghae, someone answered. I think it was Zhou Mi calling himself Donghae’s boyfriend or something.” He huffed angrily, stopping in an instant,”Then, Donghae said that he isn’t  **allowed** to go near Kyuhyun because it’s bad for his and Zhou Mi’s relationship.”

“What the-” Henry scratched the back of his head,”Is he like a pet?”

“Not the Donghae that we saw, no.” He sighed, ruffling his hair in frustration,”That’s why it’s so odd. It’s weird that one moment they were spending their free time together and as soon as Zhou Mi returns, Donghae turns cold towards Kyu.”

Henry contemplated all the information, looking at some undefined spot on the ceiling.

“I know! We should ask Minnie!” He exclaimed, snapping his fingers.

“ _ Minnie _ ?” Ryeowook deadpanned.

“A different story for a different time.” Henry said quickly,”But he’s one of Donghae’s best friends. He should know what’s wrong.”

Ryeowook nodded slowly, considering it wasn’t such a bad option. He hummed, trying to forge a puzzle to complete it’s pieces in his mind. It was surreal for him- Kyuhyun’s state, but he was one of his closest friends, thus making him happy is a priority.

“I’ll stay with Kyu, you’ll go talk to Sungmin? Try to see if he can help.” Ryeowook concluded.

 

“Actually, I think I can help.” Siwon reached the two in the hallway, walking towards them with hands folded over his chest. His face said it all, he had it written all over him.

Regret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Kyu... What's waiting for him...  
> Please leave a comment and let me know what you think! I always love reading through comments, they give me so much motivation to write for you


	11. 그냥 보고 싶어 그래

Henry hummed, going through everything he has heard so far. He managed to come into two conclusions- one, he hated Zhou Mi, and the other- he has to make things clear.  
Without even thinking, the blond was sure that Ryeowook had the same thought. Their friend was going through enough right now, and if they won’t show their concerns…  
He didn’t want to take this thought any further.  
Kyuhyun was like a brother to him; his closest friend. The time he managed to spend with Donghae was the happiest he has ever seen him. Only that, was enough for him to take control and do something. There was only one last thing that bothered him.  
“So, why shouldn’t I punch your face? You helped this _ asshole _ , after all.” His hazel eyes trailed to Siwon’s pained expression.  
“I know that I have been wrong,” Siwon said sadly,”But I want to make things right. I want to help Kyuhyun be happy, even if that means..” He paused,”Even if that means that he will be with Donghae, and not with me.”  
Henry smirked,”How noble.” He teased and folded his arms over his chest. 

They were still standing in the hallway with Kyuhyun inside the room, his sobs are clear through the walls. If he only knew, would he forgive?  
The cold night began taking its place, forcing many students to return to their dorms. It was different than a regular night, since many of them had drank and partied until late hour. The rain only made it harder to reach the designated rooms, and it gave them the perfect excuse to take their leave into someone else’s dorm.  
As people began rushing into rooms, Ryeowook had asked the rest to leave, telling them that he would stay with Kyuhyun and they should think what to do next.

There had to be a way.

  
  


Donghae’s body was draped over the bed, with his phone in his hands. He kept looking at text messages, seeing nothing new. The feeling of being in that specific room was so familiar, yet so alien to him. He felt like he didn’t belong here, nor in the situation, and it caused him immense grief.    
“What are you doing?” Zhou Mi asked softly, cradling the man from behind. His voice was sweet and calm, nothing like what it has been before. The kindness and warmness of his heart began to send little sparks, showing that it was still there.   
Donghae closed his phone and turned around,”I was thinking about the finals.” He answered in a balant lie.   
Zhou Mi sighed,”I don’t think that this is how you spell Kyuhyun.” The black haired man rolled his eyes, bringing Donghae closer,”It’s so clear that you lie to me, I don’t know why you even bother.”   
The blond looked at him, worried. Anything he would say out of place could lead Zhou Mi to hurt Kyuhyun again, and that was not an option. The man wanted more than anything to express his care and love for Kyuhyun, but couldn’t. Not when he has a cloud watching over him.    
  
It was getting close to 3AM when they reached the room, with Donghae being completely silent and obedient. Just like Zhou Mi wanted. He forced himself to stay still and entertain himself while Zhou Mi took care of things like arranging the bed, taking a shower and whatnot. This was never about Donghae, this was always about him.   
“I’m sorry.” He finally managed to almost whisper, his eyes averting the other’s.   
“Go to sleep Hae, you’ll soon forget him anyway. You’re mine.” The man in front of him pouted jokingly, and for a moment - the innocence Zhou Mi had once was getting back. As if his frozen heart began to slowly melt from Donghae’s radiant presence.   
“Yeah..” The blond muttered, and turned away from the other man, closing his eyes, hoping that this situation was nothing but a bad dream.   
  
  


 

A few days passed, without anyone talking. Kyuhyun was attending classes regularly, doing homework, fulfilling his chores, but he was absent in his mind. When he sat in class, he couldn’t concentrate and kept watching the window, trying to excuse himself from glancing Donghae’s way.   
He was hurt, but when the hours went by, and he was caught into a boring routine, he understood how much he actually missed the male. Donghae was filling his days with laughter, teasing one another and some other few things that no one could replace.   
But then again, no one could replace what has been broken. How could he let this happen? How could Donghae let this happen? He just wanted to be happy, he just wanted to love.    
As time passed Kyuhyun had harder time of keeping himself from looking at Donghae with a pained expression. The blond was so close, yet so far and unreachable, like he was taken away. Then he began noticing those little things that weren’t there before - the spark in Donghae’s eyes that vanished, the dark circles around them, the paleness that made him look miserable.   
Kyuhyun wanted to give a hand, to say anything - but was afraid to be hurt again by the thorns around his past-lover.   
  
There was also Zhou Mi. He was powerful and had enough people around him that would do anything he asks them to. Somehow, he already managed breaking something that was so dear to him, something that he cherished so much, that he was scared of what he will do next if he tries to reach out to Donghae again.    
It gave Kyuhyun a hard time - oftenly keeping him awake at night, forcing him to think and feel things he has never felt before. Some other nights, he would go to sleep having a warm dream of Donghae being next to him, calling out for him and holding him tight. There was no Zhou Mi. There was nothing broken in the dream.    
The mornings after those kind of dreams were the one he hated the most.   
  
That day he had a morning just like that, waking up in a groan, forcing himself to get off bed. Why was he having those kind of dreams when he  _ knew _ that there was no use? Fortunately, it was a day off, and the counting since he stopped talking to Donghae was almost two weeks. Oddly, the previous day Ryeowook asked him whether they could meet up or not in the music division of the school.   
He wasn’t overthinking the matter and agreed quickly, thinking perhaps it would be quieter there to have a talk. Kyuhyun looked at the soft rain tapping on the room’s window, colliding together with the strong wind that blew and bent all the trees around the dorms. The brown haired sat up slowly, looking down at his stomach. His scar was still there, marking a once sharp cut on his left muscles. Nothing can really change the past.   
He yawned and got up carefully, heading to do his morning routine.   
  


 

  
“Just make sure this is first, and the other thing is second, okay?” He confirmed, his voice skittish and unsettled.   
“Trust me, I know what I’m doing. Now go, I’ll text you later.” The other answered in a soft hum, sending him off.   


 

  
  
As Kyuhyun took the stairs to the music class, an overflowing feeling of reminiscence shook his insides all over. He looked at the wall, sadly, and saw the images of Donghae rushing him up for the first time to try and practice his vocals once more.  
His eyes were a little damp, since it was indeed just a memory - something of the past that could not be returned. He felt like a puzzle with a missing piece. Without him he would have never discovered his singing again.   
The man shook the thought off, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his coat. He looked at his phone, making sure he was on time and in place where Ryeowook had asked him to come.  
  
He entered quietly the classroom, almost instantly noticing it. That familiar guitar. That familiar guitar case. Donghae was here, practicing his guitar. It made him somewhat content to know that Donghae wasn’t hurting as much as he does.  
Kyuhyun reached next to the guitar, and looking at the chair which it leaned on, he saw a note with his name scribbled in a childish writing.  
He looked around, suspiciously, making sure there was no one else. Then, he opened the note.  
  
 _Hey. I’m not very good at writing notes on which I’m saying sorry, but just know that I am. I really wanted to make this up to you, even I know I could never._ _  
_  
Kyuhyun felt his heartbeat rising, and something began to form on top of his lungs. A knot that he didn’t even notice that existed began twisting and twirling.  
  
 _So, I remember that you really liked my ballade back then, and I thought that I can’t really put into simple words what I wanna tell you. I took my time in writing the lyrics for it, and I was writing them thinking solemnly about you._ _  
_  
He blinked a few times, trying to hold back tears.  
  
 ** _I miss you._** ** _  
_**  
His air escaped his lungs, and the knot grew bigger and bigger, choking him, causing pain to his heart.  
  
 _If you will accept my apology, I swear I will protect you. I swear I won’t let anyone hurt you. I_ ** _need_** __you.  
  
He put the note down, taking the next piece of paper in the stack. It simply said “Put it on, and turn the speaker on.”   
For a moment, he was confused, but then he noticed a cream-coloured box next to the whole setting. As he took the box carefully and opened it, he felt how the know exploded, and his feelings scattered in an overwhelming wave of heat.   
The warm tears that dropped over the soft satin cloth soaked in quickly, tracing the figure of the item inside. Kyuhyun trembled on the spot, his eyes were so watery he thought he started imagining what was actually inside.  
His cold, shaky fingers grasped onto it carefully, taking it outside. It was surreal - like living a memory all over again. Can he do that? Can he finally let himself rest a bit? Placing something that will connect him to the world, to Donghae?  
  
Kyuhyun smiled sadly, tears still running down his cheeks, as he finally put it on.   
The first thing he noticed was the soft tapping of the rain outside. Then, the whistling of the wind. A few leafs that swirled around until they finally reached to the ground. And then, he heard the footsteps.  
“You need to turn the…” Donghae sobbed, looking at him with tears of his own,”The speaker.” He kept crying, wiping again and again his own tears with the back of his hand.  
Kyuhyun couldn’t hold it anymore, and allowed himself to break down.   
Donghae’s voice was soft, playful and so much alive. It was just like he imagined it. Just like he thought it would be. When he finally realised who is in front of him, he roughly placed everything on the chair, and sunk into the other’s arms.  
The warmth that radiated from the blond was a perfect match for his cold skin. He felt two familiar arms wrapping around him, holding him close and tight.  
“This isn’t one of those dreams, right?” Kyuhyun whispered, trying to accept everything.  
“If it is, let’s just not wake up.” Donghae smiled, inhaling the scent he missed so much over the course of the weeks,”Let’s not wake up and stay like this. I couldn’t stand being that far from you.” He said softly, stroking the locks of the man in his arms.  
“So corny..” Kyuhyun joked, eyes still damp from the overwhelming emotions,”You didn’t change.” He pulled back, taking a look at the male in front of him.  
“Should I?” Donghae joked back.  
“No!” The brown haired shouted, startled. The two laughed after a moment, and sunk into each other’s arms once again.  
  
“Did you like it?” The blond asked as they finished listening to it,”I haven’t given it a name yet, maybe you can help?”   
Kyuhyun hummed,”Maybe. Let me think about it. Both of the questions. I’m not sure yet about any of them.” He teased, and received a light punch from the other.   
The hole in his heart finally began healing up.  
  
“Lee Donghae.” A familiar, angry voice startled the two,”How **dare** you.” Zhou Mi rushed inside, pulling Donghae from his sitting position, forcing him to stand, and slapped him so hard that Kyuhyun had to pull the hearing aid from his ears to prevent pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm excited to finish tomorrow this piece. Be sure to read the notes after the final chapter!


	12. Still

Donghae’s eyes raked the floor in shame. His cheek was sending off waves of pain, but he didn’t dare to pay attention to it. All those times when he had been accused of being the problem were now backlashing like an enormous wave of emotions.    
He didn’t dare to move, nor to open his lips, obediently waiting. Like Zhou Mi said before, he would get punished, he just thought - hoped, it wouldn’t be in front of Kyuhyun or involving him.    
  
“Lee Donghae, we’re going.” Zhou Mi snatched the blond’s wrist, only to get hit by Kyuhyun’s hand, blocking his way. The brown orbs glared at him with anger, mining every last bit of care Kyuhyun felt for the man.   
“Don’t lay a finger on him again.” He warned, voice clear and dangerous,”I’m sick of this. He isn’t your possession.”    
Zhou Mi’s eyes expanded in bewilderment, looking at the male in front of him, who was very close to growl his words. He can’t let Donghae go like that, after all, they made a promise, right? He was supposed to wait for him- to love him. He wasn’t supposed to love Kyuhyun.

“Don’t you  **dare** to tell me how to act with  **my** boyfriend.” He growled back, trying again - to no avail - to grasp Donghae’s wrist. He looked up to meet Kyuhyun’s gaze, as he could feel the hatred flowing from him.   
“No, don’t dare to treat him like that.” He took a step further in between the two, making sure Donghae was behind him,”He has made a choice, why can’t you simply accept that?” Kyuhyun snapped.   
  
Zhou Mi felt how tides of grief take over him. He needed to hear those words from someone, he needed to be brought back to reality. As the realization of his actions hit him, he began trembling, feeling how every part of his body was now shaking with guilt.    
He hit Donghae.    
He hit the person he cared about the most, but couldn’t show it. Zhou Mi looked at his hands warily, dropping his look to avert the others. He knew it was wrong of him - what he has done, and yet, couldn’t bring himself to say so or stop himself from doing anything further. He wanted to stop, he wanted to tell Donghae that as long as he was happy, he will be content.    
Zhou Mi gathered courage, taking a deep breath and feeling how tears finally began to break down his cheeks.   
“I’m..Sorry.” He muttered, refusing to let the others see him crying or insecure.   
  
Donghae’s head jolted up as the words rang through his ears. Something inside him began crumbling down, as if a large stone was being vaporized from his aching heart. His eyes scanned the sight in front of him and the vision sent tremors down his spine, knowing that he was pitying the man. He took in the rigid posture of the black haired man, following the soft drops that fell to the floor.   
“I know.” He almost whispered, placing his arm on Kyuhyun’s shoulder, moving him a little to face the other.   
  
“I’m so sorry, Hae..” Zhou Mi sobbed,”I’ve caused you pain.” He covered his face with his hands, too ashamed to show himself,”I’ve been wrong--” He sniffed, his tears taking over his voice.   
Donghae nodded and looked at him softly, finally seeing the side of Zhou Mi that used to be so pleasant for him.   
“I can’t forgive you yet, MiMi.” He smiled sadly,”But I want to forgive you, just let me go.” He pleaded.   
“Just let me be with the one I love.  _ Let me be with Kyuhyun _ .”

  
  
  
  


“Has it started yet?” The man leaned over to whisper to his friend, who hushed him quickly.   
“Just about to, but they have been gone much earlier, I didn’t get a chance to talk to any of them.” He folded his arms, sinking in his chair.   
  
The excitement could be felt throughout the decorated hall, as the third year students kept rushing in, finding their seats quietly. The last day couldn’t feel any better.   
The director went up on stage, and after tapping the stage microphone a few times, he fixed his glasses and spoke calmly, “Good evening, students and parents. Did you all had an easy way to find our school?” The red haired spoke, receiving a choir of ‘Yes’ from the audience.   
He smiled, his dimple appearing more notable,”Good, I’m glad. Tonight as you know, the students will be presenting their most outstanding works in front of you. Needless to say, that they have worked very hard throughout the year to make it to this spot. Needless to say as well, that the fruits of your support, the parents, will be harvested tonight.” The director flipped the cards in his hand and returned to the microphone.   
“Tonight, you will be shown three works, three works of extraordinary order. The first, a music piece written and composed by one of the music students. Without further ado, let him take it away and show the reason for it being chosen.” He bowed to the audience, leaving as loud clapping took over the silence of his absence.   
  
Donghae ran up the stage, nearly falling in the process, nearly forgetting his guitar. He leaned to the microphone, looking bashefully at the audience.   
“Uh, hello.” He began, waving a little,”My name is Lee Donghae, I’m a music major here. My song is called “Blah Blah”.” The man earned quiet laughter from the people in front of him.   
“I know, it’s a funny name,” He said apologetically,”I didn’t choose it, someone very precious to me did.” His cheeks began taking a red tint as he ruffled his hair anxiously,”It’s about someone who couldn’t hear when someone else was calling out to him.” Donghae concluded, and took his place on the solemn chair on stage.

 

The voice that came out of the speakers was almost angelic, and held just the right amount of playfulness.    
  
Kyuhyun eyed the man from the side of the stage, taking in the sweet sound surrounding him, intoxicating to his senses. He closed his eyes, and listened to the words.   
  
_ Blah blah blah blah _ __   
_ I don’t know what I said _ __   
_ All the times you were shaking and standing in front of me _ __   
_ How I prepared what to say in that time _ __   
_ Those days were filled with the fluttering of the heart _ _   
_ __ That is how, our first meeting went

 

He felt how the air that once filled his lungs was fleeing, forcing him to breath deeper. He focused on Donghae’s words that covered his heart with a warm blanket of love.

 

_ Pitter patter pat pat _ __   
_ Everyone told me good luck _ __   
_ I know how I liked you so much _ __   
_ You made me have butterflies in my stomach _ __   
_ All the many things I prepared to tell you _ _   
_ __ It feels like my falling sweat and time are tangled together

 

Kyuhyun took another step closer to the stage, counting the measures and time. Then, he stepped in, taking off the hearing aid in the process. Donghae looked at him meaningfully, sending a soft and caring glance towards him. This shouldn’t be too hard, after all, they have practiced so long.   
Kyuhyun brought the microphone to his lips and began letting go of his vocals, pouring them out like thick honey that reached deep within the audience's’ mind. His voice was finally heard.

 

_ Now I’m talking to myself _ __   
_ That I’ve really been loving you like crazy _ __   
_ That I’m sorry that I started first _ __   
_ The first time I saw you, I _ __   
_ Thought I would have a heart attack from your smile _ _   
_ __ It made me freeze

 

Their joined memories of this year will never be forgotten. The times when they spent laughing, sharing one of humans’ most natural emotion. The times when they were in pain, hearts pouring from one another. The times when they were all alone, their feelings dancing with one another, forming an unbreakable bond.

 

The path I walked together with you   
It was such a dream I had   
I would think of it and think of it   
But like a short breath   
I foolishly spent my night   
I try to talk to you again

 

Their joined voices reached everyone in the room. Henry leaned deeper into the warm feeling of Sungmin’s arm draped over him, stealing glances from the man next to him. When he could finally stop worry about Kyuhyun, Henry began taking care of himself - allowing himself to use his spare time to day, to find love. Luckily, it didn’t take too much to search, as Sungmin was feeling the same way he was, and was reluctant to try. The two took it away and brought a lot of happiness to one another, mainly sharing the common feeling of having to take care of an idiot best friend.

 

_ Every moment, I looked at you closely _ __   
_ How your lips touch the shot glass as you take a sip _ __   
_ I looked at your every detail from close and you were beautiful _ _   
_ __ When you would laugh every so often, I thought my heart would explode

 

Siwon sighed at the sweet sound that surrounded him. He smiled softly at the man besides him, the other returning him a nod. Zhou Mi had changed a lot since he accepted Donghae’s leaving and his relationship with Kyuhun. Not only within his mind, but his appearance had changed as well. What used to be sleek black hair, had become soft curls of reddish brown pigment. He became happier, investing more time in his career, and making just enough space between schedules to hang out with his friends. He no longer needed to lie, nor hide. He became himself.

 

_ Now I’m talking to myself _ __   
_ That I’ve really been loving you like crazy _ __   
_ That I’m sorry that I started first _ __   
_ The first time I saw you, I _ __   
_ Thought I would have a heart attack from your smile _ _   
_ __ It made me freeze

 

Donghae finally stood up from the chair, letting go of his guitar and allowing their voices become one in the silence around them. His brown eyes scanned the man next to him, and it was almost unbelievable how clear the singing Kyuhyun had produced. His voice was sweet yet full, sharp yet soft, and on top of all, filled with emotions. Emotions he used to hide, being afraid to show anything to anyone. But he opened up, opened up to Donghae.

 

_ The path I walked together with you _ __   
_ It was such a dream I had _ __   
_ I would think of it and think of it _ __   
_ But like a short breath _ __   
_ I foolishly spent my night _ _   
_ __ I try to talk to you again

 

The man was hesitating, thinking thoroughly whether or not should he act the way he wished. His heart pounded to the beat of the ballade, keeping him on track with his partner. As they exchanged quick glances, the emotion took over him, driving him to finally take Donghae’s hand on stage. He felt a light press and looked up to see a content smile on his lover’s face.

 

_ I won’t be shaken up this time _ _   
_ _ Blah blah _

 

As the song ended and the crowd cheered, Kyuhyun placed his hearing aid back to its rightful place. He latched onto the other’s arms, tugging him close with a hug. He felt his eyes becoming damp from the overwhelming storm of emotions.    
Donghae kissed his cheek softly, not paying attention to the rest of the world. For him, they were alone, creating the most precious moment for the two.

 

The first time they told each other they love one another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm happy to finish this, as the subject of this fic is really dear to me. I have sight disabillity, and just like Kyu (a little less romantically, I admit, and much less interesting) I learned to cope with it.  
> I hoped that through this I could bring the subject up, letting everyone who is struggling with any type of disabillity that there's no shame in that.   
> 화이팅!!!


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